The Situation …
by Lady Cleo
Summary: An alternate universe where Jackie never dated Kelso or joined the basement gang. J/H
1. The Unattainable Jackie Burkhart

The Situation by Lady Cleo

All Disclaimers apply!

Note: This is an alternate universe where Jackie never dated Kelso, so a lot of stuff hasn't happened. For example: Jackie never set Donna up with Casey, so Donna and Eric never got back together.

Chapter One: The Unattainable Jackie Burkhart

* * *

Edited 10/18/2010

"Man she's hot," Hyde had once heard Kelso laugh, "the hottest chick on the cheerleading squad." But, when pushed on why she hadn't dated him- "She called me a man whore when I asked her out."

That was Jackie Burkhart, the Snow Queen of Point Place High, its most popular cheerleader, and most sought after beauty. She was the only junior in the history of Point Place to make Captain of the 'Varsity Cheerleading Squad'. The only junior in Point Place history to be crowned 'Snow Queen' two years in a row, with a definite shoe in for her third year of running.

When she walked, the boys dropped before her, bowing to her every whim. She was the perfect unattainable date, rumored to be a hot little number in bed. The girls followed behind her, picking up the stragglers that Jackie didn't take. They worshipped the ground she walked on, trying at all times to be just as perfect, just as beautiful as Jaclyn Beulah Burkhart.

No one questioned the order; there was nothing to question. That was how it'd been and how it was going to be. Long after graduation, they would undoubtedly look back, remember her, and wonder whatever happened to that one perfect girl that everybody wanted to be.

Someone had once commented to Donna, who intern had spilled the beans to Eric, who had commented casually to Hyde: that if Jackie had said yes to Michael Kelso- it would be a vastly different world.

Like he cared.

The only thoughts that Hyde ever spared for the Point Place Snow Queen was that: Yes, she was hot, but not worth the trouble. Yes, she was a spoiled rich bitch. No, he didn't ever dwell on her shallow being or anything that revolved around her shallow world. Yes, she was very hot. And, (something he'd never admit to thinking) she did intrigue him.

Mostly the perfect unattainable Jackie hadn't given Steven Hyde a second thought. After all, Burkhart hadn't talked to Hyde since middle school, and that had only been a shallow burn to the older boy about his lack of taste in woman. Now, in his senior year, she was the junior who ruled over the varsity cheerleading squad, dated all the cute football players and the occasionally student body president.

Hyde's only comment to this- silence.

* * *

The Situation: Point Place, Wisconsin: The Hub.

It was your normal Friday night in the small suburb of Point Place. The Hub teemed with teenagers smacking on fries and hitting on the opposite sex. It was a situation that Steven Hyde usually didn't succumb to, after all peppy crowds weren't his style. Unfortunately, Red Foreman declared it a "night without you dumb asses around" and promptly booted all humans under twenty out of the house.

Kelso was laughing over his latest score with some slut of a chick, Fez sat munching on candy and laughing over Kelso antics while Donna and Eric continued giving each other forlorn 'why aren't we dating when we want each other so much' looks. Hyde sat silently at he end of the table, watching the proceedings with little to no interest. Damn, why hadn't some idiot brunette set her up with some bad influence like say, Casey Kelso, so they could realize that they really wanted each other. Where the thought came from bothered Hyde for only a second, but he pushed it off. Probably a side effect from being around Foreman too much.

Out of the corner of his eye, Hyde caught a glimpse of 'The Snow Queen' and her flock of cheerleaders giggling around their little table. Jackie had wrapped herself around her latest boy toy, some idiot named Chip. The couple appeared to be having a minor dispute and Hyde guessed that Jackie's three week dating period was about up; the current idiot was about to be dumped for being in too much of a hurry to get under her skirt.

Hyde looked away for just a second. When his gaze returned to the couple Jackie was storming towards the door, Chip in close pursuit. Her blond followers watched their retreating backs with atypical confused expressions.

"And their goes another one of Point Place's Annual Snow King Nominees down the drain. And who do you expect to be the next nominee for this year Kelso?" Foreman laughed, Donna rolled her eyes and punched him in the arm.

"Personally," Fez declared eagerly, "I' am hoping that I'm the next candidate. After all she's running out of men to date."

Hyde rolled his eyes, getting sick of the pushy crowd he stood, "I'm out of here." The group barely noticed his departure. They were too busy making jokes about the next nominees for Snow King and how long Kelso could continue dating the entire cheerleading squad without causing a cat fight.

* * *

The Situation: Hub Parking Lot.

Hyde made it nearly to the other side of the parking lot when a loud commotion caught his attention. Not a few feet away Jackie and Chip stood in heated argument, that sound to Hyde like it was on the verge of getting violent. Hyde pushed down any thoughts that popped up in his head and continued to make his way towards the El Camino further down the parking lot.

"You god damned bitch." Chip yelled, his hand rearing back as he slapped the small brunette violently across the face. Jackie stumbled under the force, her body slamming into a nearby car as she fell weakly to her knees.

Now as much as Hyde considered himself a cold unfeeling guy, he couldn't ignore that; no matter how bitchy the little cheerleader could be.

Hyde took the few steps separating him from the idiot quickly; he tapped Chip on the shoulder, and flexed his fist. A second later Hyde stepped over the unconscious form, nodding his head at his good aim as he moved towards the sobbing female form. She was clutching her arms, crying uncontrollably, her little form shaking violently from the force of her tears. Damn, Hyde couldn't stand it when they cried. It left him no choice but to act. He frowned as he reached down, wrapping his arms under hers and gently pulling her to her feet. Jackie's large eyes gazed up at him, questioning his presence as the tears continued streaking down her face.

Hyde tired to stable the shaking form on her own two feet, but found when he released his grip around her waist she didn't stand, but simply started crashing back down to the hard cement. He stood their awkwardly, her face buried against his chest, the tears soaking his favorite Led Zeppelin shirt. Damn, he couldn't let this continue. Reaching down he swept the small girl off her feet, pulling her tightly to his chest.

Where to take her? Defiantly not back to her little demon friends huddled around a table back in the Hub. Mrs. Foreman. Now there was a woman who had every answer to every question. Stepping back over the body, Hyde headed down the parking lot towards the El Camino, already forming a plan as to how he could sneak the small sobbing form into the basement.

* * *

The Situation: The Foreman Residence, The Basement.

Jackie sat on the couch quietly, her knees pressed to her chest, tears streaming down her face. Personally, she didn't know why she was so upset. She'd been planning on breaking up with Chip for sometime. And it wasn't like this was the first time she'd ever been slapped. Still, she sat there alone, waiting for the return of her- well, she wasn't sure if Steven Hyde was her hero or not. A smile crept across her face as she recalled Chip crashing to the ground. Now that had been the best thing that had happened to her all week.

Jackie wiped away the tears, trying to focus on the brief happy thought.

It didn't last for long.

Her life suddenly came pouring down on her shoulders. At school she was worshipped, but alone. When she went home it was the same, her parents always at work or out having fun in some other state. And her friends, what friends? Every single person that claimed to be her friend would socially destroy her if thought they had the chance.

The sound of footsteps interrupted Jackie's thoughts and she had to force herself to remain still, trying to control the urge to flee. Hyde walked over, setting a cup of tea and plate of cookies in front of her. "This is Mrs. Foreman-" Hyde started to say, but Kitty pushed past him, wrapping a blanket around Jackie and pulling her into a tight hug.

"You poor baby." Jackie let the woman embrace her, finding comfort in her motherly embrace. She sobbed into her shoulder, wanting what she didn't have.

"Kitty." Red yelled from upstairs. In response the woman gently released Jackie.

"I'll be right back honey. You just," Kitty paused for a second, her eyes wandering the room to finally rest on Hyde. "You just cry on Steven for a few seconds." She declared as she stood, then pushed Steven down to the couch. Jackie immediately latched onto him, her face burying into his shoulder.

Hyde sat there, confused by this sudden change. A wave of Déjà vu crashed through his head. Still, there was very little he could do in this situation. His arms came up, encircling the girl's small waist, his hand gently rubbing along her back.

Fervently he wished for the return of Mrs. Foreman. But, even as he sat there, gently rocking the unattainable Jackie Burkhart he knew something was changing. The situation, the unquestionable order somehow seemed twisted out of whack in the small basement. And the Snow Queen, she didn't seem to be sitting on such a high throne down here, crying in the arms of Steven Hyde. Yet, still he continued to comfort the small form, ignoring the nagging little voice that told him things were about to get very weird in Point Place.


	2. The Bad Ass, Bad Boy Steven Hyde

The Situation by Lady Cleo

All Disclaimers apply!

Recap: This is an alternate universe where Jackie never dated Kelso so a lot of stuff hasn't happened.

Chapter Two: The Bad Ass, Bad Boy Steven Hyde

* * *

Edited 10/18/2010

Point Place High was buzzing with the latest gossip about the largely questionable breakup of the perfectly perfect Jackie Burkhart and the black eyed, big mouthed Chip.

When asked where he got that black eye, Chip had shrugged it off with a, "Had to beat up some freshman who got in a lucky punch." When asked about his break up with the perfect little Jackie Burkhart, "She just wasn't my type."

And Jackie, her response- silence.

A small rumor had briefly surfaced that Steven Hyde, Point Place's own version of a rebel had walked in on Chip making a move on Jackie that she didn't want. Jackie's comment on the situation, nothing.

Everyone knew that it was entirely possible. Chip had been known to act a little crazy and Steven Hyde? Well, just about everyone knew how hard he could punch. But, would Point Place's own bad boy act in defense of its reigning Snow Queen?

No one dared to ask the rebel. But, when they asked Eric Foreman, the scrawny boy who was commonly associated as Hyde's best friend, the answer was: "Hyde, defend a cheerleader's honor? What are you on man? Whatever it is, share."

Donna, considered as one of Point Places currently attainable dates, but also commonly known to be currently head over heels for the scrawny boy added: "Hyde hasn't talked to Jackie in years, but yeah, he's the kind of guy who would probably step in to defend her honor."

No one knew that in reality the unattainable Jackie Burkhart, Snow Queen, and perfectly perfect cheerleader had fallen asleep in the arms of Steven Hyde, the bad ass, bad boy of Point Place. No one knew that said bad ass had carried said cheerleader to her doorstep and deposited her into the arms of a not too worried father. MR. Burkhart had seemed more pissed off because Hyde had wrung the doorbell so late at night instead of the fact that his daughter had a bruise the size of a fist. Consequently, said bruise disappeared perfectly behind the right foundation and concealer.

The world recovered from the rumor of Jackie and Hyde's late night meeting rather quickly when Cynthia Netting spread the news that Michael Kelso and Pam Macy were dating again. Point Place High returned to the order. Burkhart went back to being the perfect little her and Steven Hyde remained the radical bad boy.

* * *

The Situation: Point Place High School.

One week after that Friday Night.

Steven Hyde sat quietly on the hood of the El Camino, watching the door to the Gym, waiting impatiently for Kelso to finish making out with Pam Macy. On any other day Kelso would have gotten his ass deserted, but on this occasion Hyde had an alternative motive.

The gym doors swung open and a parade of varsity cheerleaders trotted out in their skimpy little skirts, laughing happily. They never noticed Hyde as they climbed into their cars and roared down the street blasting their god-awful disco music. Hyde focused back on the door, waiting patiently.

Jackie Burkhart immerged, looking exasperated as she walked over to a bench, never noticing Hyde's quiet presence. Silently she pulled out a small compact mirror, her fingers lightly tracing the invisible bruise.

"You know piling that junk over it doesn't help." Hyde commented casually. Jackie's head jerked in his direction, shock running rampant over her features.

"What do you care?" She finally snapped back.

"I stopped him from doing more, didn't I?" Hyde questioned, his sunglasses hiding the glare that slipped past the mask.

Jackie blushed, bowing her head. Hyde couldn't tell if it was from embarrassment or anger. She slipped the mirror back into her backpack, hefting it over her shoulder as she walked silently over to the El Camino. She looked up at him with her large brown eyes and softly asked, "Why did you do it?"

Hyde snorted, "I have to have a reason?"

Jackie silently nodded her head. Hyde didn't answer; instead he turned his gaze away from her small form.

Minutes ticked away slowly.

"What are you doing out here anyway, don't you have a car or something?" Hyde asked keeping his gaze away from hers.

Jackie let her backpack slip to the ground as she leaned against the El Camino, straightening the pleats of her cheerleading skirt. "No, mine's not working. It stopped working after my dad left so I have to wait another week before I can get it fixed." Hyde couldn't stop his eyebrow from shooting up. "I'm waiting for Pam; she's going to give me a ride home. That is, once she pulls her tongue out of that man whore's throat."

Hyde let a laugh slip past his lips and smiled in her direction, finally letting his gaze meet hers as he slipped off the hood. "Come on, I'll give you a ride home." Jackie gazed up at him, a look of utter bafflement crossing her face.

Was the Bad Boy of Point Place offering the Snow Queen a ride home?

"Come on, anybody who calls Kelso a man whore doesn't deserve to wait for his latest slut to give her a ride home."

Jackie let a smile creep across her face as she reached down grabbing her backpack and heading over to the passenger side.

* * *

The Situation: Burkhart Residence.

Hyde pulled the El Camino to a halt in front of the towering house and turned off the engine. Jackie smiled politely over at Hyde as she reached for the door handle. "Thanks." She whispered before climbing out of the car and heading towards the front door reluctantly.

Hyde watched her retreating back, an internal battle raging within his head. On one hand, his motive had been achieved. She was physical okay, who cared about her obvious emotional struggle, not him that was for sure.

Hyde started the El Camino, shifted it into drive, but his foot wouldn't release the brake. He kept on seeing the lonely expression on her face, kept on hearing the sobbing.

Damn it- He wasn't supposed to have emotions. He DIDN'T have emotions- He was a bad ass Zen master who didn't care about the shallow little Burkhart girl. It didn't matter that she was all alone in that big house with a broken car, and shallow friends who probably didn't give a damn if she starved to death. Damn it-

He was going to have to steal something after this.

Hyde turned off the car and pushed the door open unwillingly. He walked silently across the perfectly manicured yard and rang the doorbell, half expecting some kind of butler to answer the door.

Jackie pulled the heavy ornate wood door open and froze, her eyes going large as she gazed up at him in awe.

"Where's the car?"

Jackie stuttered for a second, then finally took a step back and pointed towards the back of the house. He stormed past her, ignoring the fine interior, the expensive decorations and the museum like feel it all provide. There wasn't a soul in sight, not even a maid.

The garage was just beyond the down-right inviting pool and spa. It was a three-car garage that looked empty with just the one lonely car sitting in the back. Hyde easily yanked open the hood and gazed into the dark confines of the car engine.

Damn, this was going to take a while.

"Tools?" Hyde questioned bluntly. Jackie pointed towards a large wall cabinet. Hyde nodded as he removed his sunglasses, settling down to the hard work in front of him.

* * *

The Situation: The Burkhart Residence.

Jackie sat cross legged silently beside the car, two empty cans, and an half empty bowl of chips. Her fingers played with the edge of her clothes, having changed out of the uniform and into a pair of jeans and lose peasant blouse a while ago. She sat there, watching the headless Hyde tinker within the hood. Through the open garage doors she could see the setting sun.

Hyde finally pulled back, wiping his brow as he gazed down at the car. He'd been working on this car all afternoon and he still couldn't figure out what the hell was going on within the confines. If he had believed in fate, Hyde would have said that this car wasn't meant to be fixed easily.

"Well?" Jackie inquired eagerly.

Hyde shook his head no and closed the lid. "Damn woman- What do you expect, miracles? I'm not a paid mechanic and it still needs some work." Jackie slowly pulled herself to her feet, nodding in response to his statement. Hyde frowned for a second, watching as she started picking up the bowl and cans. "I'll pick you up after cheerleading on Monday and we can work on it some more." Hyde causally added, heading towards the house.

Jackie froze in step, a smile creeping across her face. "Sure," She whispered, before following in his footsteps.

Damn, he was going to have to steal a shit load of stuff, and do some pretty illegal things to counter all the good deeds he was doing lately.

As he headed out the front door, Jackie following slowly behind him, the pit of his stomach suddenly launched. There it was again. The nagging feeling that something was changing, something was changing fast. He tired to push it aside, but it just continued to push back.

As Point Place's notorious troublemaker climbed into his El Camino, the perfect Snow Queen stood watching from the front door, the first genuinely happy smile slipping across her face as she closed the door.

The unattainable Jackie Burkhart was slowly falling head over heels in love with the bad ass, bad boy, Steven Hyde.


	3. Hyde's Got A Girl?

The Situation.  
  
By Lady Cleo  
  
All Disclaimers apply!  
  
Recap: This is an alternate universe where Jackie never dated Kelso so lots of stuff hasn't happened.  
  
Chapter Three: Hyde's got a girl?  
  
It was just a rumor!  
  
Or at least that's what half of Point Place High wanted to believe. The perfectly perfect Jackie Burkhart and the infamous rebel Steven Hyde? Not possible! But Pam Macy swore on her heart that she saw the two together, that Jackie had mysterious received other rides home this week.  
  
Few believed her.  
  
Cynthia commented "Pam's been spending too much time with Kelso. That basement they hang out in does something weird to people."  
  
To which Rodger added, "It's not the basement, it's what they do down in the basement."  
  
When asked about these rumors, the man pretty Kelso replied, "Jackie and Hyde? Not possible! No! Now Jackie and Kelso, that sounds good! But Damn! She's just playing so hard to get..." He was cut off when Pam slapped him and stormed off.  
  
Jackie's response to the rumors. "What do you care?"  
  
Donna causally mentioned this latest rumor to the scrawny neighbor boy that was head over heels in love with her. He intern reported this latest, totally untrue, rumor to Hyde.  
  
Hyde's response, "Ha! Since when do those preppy basterds spread rumors about me?"  
  
That seemed to be the end of any and all rumors, what with unconfirmed denials from both parties. It was just assumed that Pam had finally started hanging around the basement too much. After all Jackie Burkhart didn't date just anybody. She dated only the most popular.  
  
And Steven Hyde, well, he didn't date! There was no question about that. One night stands maybe, a few public displays of affection with random girls, but no dates! After all Steven Hyde wasn't your normal Point Place Teenager. He was the bad ass, bad boy of Point Place. If he didn't want to go to class he simply didn't show up. And the detention monitors, they knew his name, just not his face.  
  
Eric causally mentioned to that girl he's totally in love with that Jackie's little gang of followers would never let her be seen with such a man as Steven Hyde. Of course they didn't necessarily know everything about the perfectly perfect little Jackie Burkhart.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the basement:  
  
Wednesday afternoon .  
  
Eric Foreman, a.k.a. the scrawny boy, sat silently beside Donna Pinciotti, both trying desperately to ignore each other. While Fez, on the other hand, sat in Hyde's chair, eyes glued to the Television as Charlie's angels high kicked their way out of a battle. The only thing on his mind was Charlie's angels.  
  
However, Donna sat miserably, pleading with some higher being to give her a solution to the current situation with Eric. 'Why can't he just turn around and tell me he loves me? Why can't I just turn around and tell him I love him? Damn it we need some kind of mediator. Preferably female! Fex, Kelso, and Hyde don't understand. Red and Bob don't care and Kitty, well she's been acting kind of weird lately. Damn it I need a girl to talk to! And Fez doesn't count this time.'  
  
Eric sighed trying to focus on the television all the while thinking, 'Look she's right there, just turn around and tell her how much you love her. Man what would Hyde tell you to do? He would say...' Eric's eyebrow shot up. 'What would he say? Man where is Hyde when you need him?'  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. Burkhart Residence:  
  
Hyde sat on the ground beside the problem car, munching silently on a bag of chips while sipping from a beer. "How's it going down there?"  
  
Jackie pushed out from under the car, lifting the goggles off her face. "I think that did it!"  
  
Hyde nodded, pushing himself off the ground and dusting his pants off before reaching down to help the small girl stand, "Why don't you try starting it now?"  
  
Jackie nodded nervously reaching in through the open window she turned the ignition. The car roared to life.  
  
Jackie squealed, jumping into Hyde's arm happily. Hyde let a chuckle out, letting her have her moment of triumph before gently pushing the girl off him. "Jeez woman, calm down. It's not like we just struck it rich!"  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the basement:  
  
i Eric turned slowly towards Donna, "Look Donna, I love you."  
  
Donna grinned happily, "Eric I love you too. I'm so sorry for everything we fought over!" She scooted over, wrapping her arms around his waist as they leaned in too each other, their lips about to touch... /i  
  
"Eric?" Donna asked, Eric shook his head trying to clear the nice little fantasy away, "Eric, are you okay?" He nodded, shifting uncomfortably. Donna went back to watching the television.  
  
Kelso and Pam suddenly trotted down the stairs. "Hey guys!" Kelso greeted taking in the situation before him. "Pam and I are going to run down to the DMV so I can get a new license. After that we were thinking of heading over to the Hub and grabbing something to eat. You guys want to come?"  
  
Fez nodded jumping up from his chair, right now he would do just about anything to escape the uncomfortable silence of Donna and Eric.  
  
Both of whom had just both agreed to come.  
  
The foreign exchange student internal cursed. At least with Kelso there it wouldn't be totally silent.  
  
"So where's Hyde?" Kelso asked as they headed out the door.  
  
"I don't know, haven't seen him all afternoon." Eric answered as they began piling into the Vista Cruiser. "So Kelso how'd you lose your license?"  
  
"Dogs eat it!"  
  
"Really? How?"   
  
Kelso paused for a second, "Fine. I lost it. You happy now?"  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. Burkhart Residence, the Kitchen:  
  
Jackie giggled from her seat beside Hyde at the kitchen table, watching as he hungrily devoured the food she'd placed before him. "Thank god we fixed that car." Hyde raised an eyebrow. "My dad called last night and said he was going to have to spend two more weeks in New York. My Mom's still partying in Hawaii, so I was looking forward to another two weeks of walking to school every morning."  
  
"If your parent's are never home where does the food come from, the clean rooms, you clothes?"  
  
"During the day, while I'm at school, the maids come. And once a week we have food and other stuff delivered." Jackie answered.  
  
Hyde nodded his head, finding it a rich version of his own tale. Just in her case the parents still paid the bills and stopped by for a visit every once in a while. "Sounds like your living in a hotel!"  
  
Jackie reluctantly nodded her head in agreement. Hyde watched her silently for a second, wondering how she always managed to betrayal every emotion in her eyes. Wondering how in the hell she could be strong enough to stand the neglect of her parents and her crappy school life all in one. Damn it he shouldn't care!  
  
So then why did the thought of her sleeping here all alone without any sort of protection irk him so much?  
  
Sun rays bounced through the kitchen window, reminding Hyde that he should be getting home. "Do you have a phone?" He asked, already regretting what he was about to do. Jackie nodded pointing to one of the counters behind him, confused by his sudden request.  
  
Hyde quickly dialed the Foramen residence before he could back out of it. "Mrs. Foreman? It's me Steven." Jackie watched him inquisitively, "Is Eric coming to dinner tonight?.....No?.....No we didn't get into a fight.....I was just wondering.....I wanted to tell you that I'm bringing someone to dinner tonight.....Yes Mrs. Foreman.....No Mrs. Foreman Chrissy's not back in town....I know you didn't like her Mrs. Foreman....... It's Jackie Mrs. Foreman....No she's okay......I swear I didn't have to come to her rescue again......Mrs. Foreman she's fine....Okay.....Bye." Hyde hung the phone back up and turned to Jackie, "Come on!"  
  
Jackie gazed back at him silently.  
  
"Damn woman! I know you heard the conversation, now get in the car!" Hyde declared before marching towards the front door.  
  
Jackie just couldn't hold back a smile as she raced after him happily. Who would have known that Steven Hyde could ever care about her?  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the kitchen:  
  
Hyde pulled open the Kitchen door, leading Jackie into the Foreman kitchen. Kitty was running around the kitchen making last minute preparations for dinner. She froze as soon as she spotted Jackie and Hyde enter the kitchen. "Oh, you poor baby!" She declared dropping what she was doing and pulling Jackie into a tight hug.  
  
Red chose that moment to walk into the kitchen, "What the hell? Are we taking in another one Kitty? Damn how many kids do you want living in this house? We've already got close to fourteen and another one on the way!"  
  
Kitty laughed nervously finally releasing Jackie, "Red honey, this is Jackie Burkhart, she's just staying for dinner. Steven invited her over, wasn't that nice?"  
  
Red grunted, "Where's the other dumb ass?"  
  
"Eric's getting dinner at the Hub with the other boys." Kitty laughed, "Now, why don't you all go wait in the living room while I finish dinner." Red grunted a positive, grabbing his newspaper as he headed into the living room, Jackie and Hyde silently following behind him.  
  
Just as the door swung shut Eric opened the glass door and walked into the kitchen. "Hey Mom, got bored, what's for dinner?" He asked picking at the loaf of bed sitting on the kitchen table.  
  
"Eric Honey I need you to get out of here!" Kitty declared as she started chopping up some vegetables.  
  
"Mom?"  
  
"Steven's got a girl in there and I don't want you ruining tonight! Go hang out at the Hub or something honey." Kitty ordered, dropping the knife she walked over to her son and all but steered him towards the door.  
  
"But Mom Donna's at the Hub!"  
  
"Well suck it up and tell her you like her finally!" Kitty ordered as she pushed her son out, closing the glass door behind him.  
  
"Wait a minute!" Eric muttered, "Hyde's got a girl?"  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, back porch:  
  
Kelso, Fez, Donna and Foreman stood on the back porch talking in low tones.  
  
"You're telling me that Hyde's got a girl in there?" Kelso questioned.  
  
Fez frowned, moaning into his hands, "This is such a cruel world. Hyde can get I girl but I can not!"  
  
"Did you see her?" Kelso questioned, "You sure Chrissy's just not back in town?"  
  
Foreman rolled his eyes, throwing his arms up in the air, "Look we all know my mom didn't like Chrissy, why would she be all worried about making dinner perfect if Hyde had brought Chrissy over."  
  
"Hey, let's go spy on them! I'll just run home and change into my ninja outfit." Kelso eagerly declared.   
  
Eric, Donna and Fez each exchanged glances, "Good idea Kelso, I just don't think this calls for the Ninja suit." Donna smiled, nodding her head.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, outside the dinning room:  
  
Kelso, Fez, Donna, Foreman are hiding in the bushes that surround the windows.  
  
Foreman: I can't see anything.  
  
Donna: Okay, whoever has their hand on my ass better move it fast.  
  
Fez: Sorry.  
  
Kelso: Can you see anything Eric?  
  
Foreman: All I see is Kitty laughing, and oh my god!  
  
Kelso: What? Who is it?  
  
Foreman: I don't know but Hyde just smiled.  
  
Fez: You lying American Scum. Hyde does not smile for females!  
  
Donna: Oh my god, he is smiling at her.  
  
Foreman: The worlds about to end, because my dad seems to be enjoying himself. What I would give to be in that room, man!  
  
Kelso: Just tell me who the girl is?  
  
Donna: All I see is the back of her head. She's got long brunette hair, and she wearing a flower patterned dress. I think she's short, because she seems to be about the height of Mrs. Foreman.  
  
Kelso: If you would move you ass Donna and let me have a look I bet I could tell you who it is.  
  
Donna: (Angrily) Fine!  
  
The bushes rustle as the group exchanges places.  
  
Foreman: Fez, get your foot out of my face.  
  
Fez: I would if Kelso would move his big ass.  
  
Kelso: Wait, where are they going? Damn I can't see her, Hyde's blocking the view.  
  
Donna: Fez, for the last time get your hand off my ass!"  
  
Fez: Sorry!  
  
The group goes quiet as they catch the sound of the El Camino starting in the distance. Red walks around the corner, and pauses as he catches the sound of their voices.  
  
Foreman: Now that I've seen what listening to you idiots accomplished, which would be NOTHING, I'm starving.  
  
Donna: Why the hell are we still down here?  
  
Red smirks walking over to the bush. "That's what I was wondering dumb asses!"  
  
The reaction was immediate as all four teenager scrambled to get to their feet, facing Red in horror. "Ah damn!" Eric whispered.  
  
Note: Once again I LOVE you all for reviewing. Signed Lady Cleo... 


	4. Fluffy Cakes aka Killer!

The Situation.  
  
By Lady Cleo  
  
All Disclaimers apply!  
  
Recap: This is an alternate universe where Jackie never dated Kelso so lots of stuff hasn't happened.  
  
Chapter Four: Fluffy Cakes a.k.a. Killer!  
  
Point Place High School could have been called a gossip hot spot. But right now it had zilch, nada, nothing. All because of the Varsity Cheerleading Captain, the perfect little Jackie Burkhart.  
  
It had been three weeks, maybe more since the questionable breakup of Jackie and Chip. Three weeks and there were no potential Snow King nominees, not one. Jackie didn't date lightly, her relationships lasted at least three weeks and she always had another man lined up for when the current one got a little too eager.  
  
When Cynthia finally got the nerve up to ask Jackie about her situation, the reply was only more baffling.  
  
"I've got my eye on someone."  
  
Donna causally mentioned this latest piece of news to that boy she's crazy about. His reply, "That sounds oddly like in Star Wars when Darth Vadar......" He was cut of by several sharp objects being tossed in his direction. Need I say more?  
  
Kelso, the man voted prettiest man-pretty man in the History of Point Place commented, "YES! Finally I'm going to get that hot little number all to myself!" He never got to add anything because Pam Macy socked him and stormed out. "What's the matter baby?" He was heard calling as he chased after the leggy blonde.  
  
That freaky foreign kid that's always commenting about his 'needs' said something like, "I noticed that she was giving my the eye a couple of days ago."  
  
To which Donna added, "Fez she wasn't looking at you, she was glaring at you because you were leering at her. "  
  
To which Fez replied, "Grrrr, sexy! She wants me!"  
  
Hyde's comment, well he spread out his hands in confusion and asked "Who? What? Where?"  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Burkhart Residence:  
  
Saturday afternoon .  
  
Hyde pulled to a halt outside of the towering brick house and gazed silently at the small item beside him. He felt stupid! This was the kind of thing Foreman did, not Steven Hyde. But hopefully this would be a solution to the whole Snow Queen problem, maybe after this he could get her out of his mind. Shoving off any last resignation, any last doubt, and any last internal resistance Hyde grabbed the small object and pushed the door open.  
  
He walked slowly across the yard, pausing halfway up the manicured lawn. "God this is stupid!" He whispered gazing down at the object. She probably wouldn't even like it. What the hell did he care anyway? Where the hell was the Zen Master that had been replaced by this Foreman carboncopy? "Just give her the damn thing and be done with Jackie Burkhart forever!"  
  
Steeling his shoulders Hyde marched up the yard, ringing the doorbell. The door flew open to revel Jackie, obviously confused at the sight of him. Hyde thrust the small object out. "Here, this is for you!"  
  
Jackie blinked gazing down at the object, her face softening at its appearance. "It'll keep you company and scare off any intruders." Jackie didn't seem to hear a word as she squealed happily, reaching out she grabbed the puppy pulling it into a tight hug.  
  
The small Doberman Pincher started wagging its tail eagerly at Jackie's excitement. "Oh thank you! He's so cute! I think I'll call him Fluffy Cakes!"  
  
Hyde's mouth dropped open as Jackie trotted back into the house. "You can't call him Fluffy Cakes!" He declared following after her. "You're supposed to call it something scary, so just calling the dog's name scares off people. Something ferocious like Killer, Satan, Diablo, or even Fido! Something that'll show it's a mean dog who'll protect the house. Damn woman!"  
  
Jackie ignored him, setting the puppy on the kitchen table she walked over to the fridge. "Fluffy Cakes looks hungry!"  
  
Hyde threw up his arms in frustration.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. Foreman Residence, the basement:  
  
"How can Hyde have a girl? How could we not have noticed he had a girl? Why hasn't he brought her over here? Is he ashamed of us?" Donna demanded. Kelso rolled his arms, wrapping his arm around Pam's shoulder. Fez continued munching on his bowl of candy, his eyes following Donna as she paced the room.  
  
Eric suddenly trotted down the stairs, "So yeah, I just found out my grandparents are flying over on Monday to hear the big news about my mom." He paused noticing that Donna hadn't stopped pacing. "Is she still going on about Hyde's girl?"  
  
"Yeah!" The three replied.  
  
Donna paused glaring at the four other occupants. "So when do we confront him?" Four blanks stares meet hers. "Look, why is he ashamed of us? I mean I could use another girl to talk to too. And he's denying me of that pleasure."  
  
Kelso shifted in his seat, pulling Pam closer. "You can always talk to Pam here big D!"  
  
"No, she can't!" Pam answered rather too quickly.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. Burkhart Residence:  
  
Hyde sat on couch, watching the large screen television, the Doberman puppy sitting silently beside him, napping lightly on a pillow. Jackie entered from the kitchen carrying a bunch of snacks and drinks. She slipped into the seat between Hyde and Fluffy Cakes, "Aw, look at my little puppy. I'm going to have to get him a collar with his name engraved on it. My little Fluffy Cakes!"  
  
"Killer!" Hyde countered grabbing the bag of chips. "His name is Killer!"  
  
Jackie rolled her eyes, "He's my dog and his name is Fluffy Cakes!"  
  
"Killer!"  
  
"Fluffy Cakes!"  
  
"Killer! You do not name a mean killing machine Fluffy Cakes!"  
  
Jackie set the drinks down, turning in her seat to gaze at Hyde. "Look Steven, you gave him to me! Therefore his name will remain Fluffy Cakes!" Hyde rolled his eyes as Jackie's grin grew larger, "And, I would like to thank you for Fluffy Cakes!"  
  
Hyde nodded, turning his gaze away from her bright shining eyes. He shrugged, but nearly froze when he felt her hand trail up along his arm, slipping around his neck, her fingers gently playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. 'What the hell?' Hyde thought, confused by the sudden action. Was she coming on to him? No, it wasn't possible.  
  
Jackie leaned in slowly, placing a quick kiss on his cheek. "I mean it Steven! Thank you!" Her free hand came up, gently cupping the side of his face and gently pulling his gaze towards hers.  
  
That was his key to bolt, that was the big warning sign. Jackie Burkhart was not a one night stand girl. No, Jackie Burkhart was the kind of girl you married, the kind of girl who needed a stable relationship. Steven Hyde was not a relationship man, he was not the marrying kind, would never be the marrying kind. And he knew that the only thing a relationship like this would bring would be heart break, not for him, but for her. And the very thought of hurting the fragile little girl with the will of stone scared him. He didn't want to, but he didn't trust her, and that meant that he would end up hurting her.  
  
So he needed to break her heart now?  
  
It made no sense to him, absolutely no sense. Either way it would end the same. The unattainable Jackie Burkhart would get hurt and the rebel Steven Hyde wouldn't. He told himself that if he pulled away now it wouldn't hurt as much. But he knew that was a lie. Maybe if he had pulled away after the first incident, if he hadn't given her that ride home he could have prevented any harm. But it was too late!  
  
Jackie gently pulled him closer, her lips briefly touching his, her eyes lolling shut as she waited for his response.  
  
It was in that moment as Hyde gazed down at the fragile young woman he'd come to know over the past weeks that he knew it all. Even as he gazed down at her naked emotions exposed to him, her naive little heart there for the taking that he came to realize he didn't matter. No matter what he did for himself she'd get hurt, and he didn't want that.  
  
So why not let her hurt him?  
  
It was a stupid thought, but it wasn't going away.  
  
After all Zen would keep him afloat; Zen would see him through it all. Why not let her get over him slowly, let her eventually break his heart? It was a flawed plan, and just the thought of how much it would hurt scared him. And it could be a stupid trap; he might wake up twenty years from now still waiting for her to leave him.  
  
Jackie started to pull away, her hand dropping from his cheek.  
  
It was now or never!  
  
Pain for him or pain for her?  
  
Hyde slowly slipped his arms around her waist, pulling her gently back to him, his head bowing, and his heart beating like a thousand drums. Jackie's hands clutched his shoulders gently, her head tilting. In painfully slow motions he let his lips gently caress hers, a brief inquisitive kiss. She was breathing lightly, but deeply, her eyes still squeezed shut.  
  
What the hell was he getting himself into?  
  
Hyde let his eyes droop as his lips met hers again in a slow kiss, their lips exploring, hearts beating wildly. His free hand came up, diving into her soft hair, gently holding her head. Jackie gently melted into his embrace responding timidly, slowly deepening the kiss.  
  
The world suddenly seemed to freeze time. And the bad boy of Point Place held its Snow Queen tightly in his arms, clinging to her like she was a lifeline. And oxygen, well that wasn't needed.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. Foreman Residence:  
  
The sun had set long ago, dinner had been finished, dishes done and all that was left to do was sit around the kitchen table eating brownies. And Eric Foreman absolutely intended to do just that, with his mother.  
  
They were well into their feasting when suddenly Red stormed into the kitchen from the living room. "Where's the other dumb ass?"  
  
Eric shrugged his shoulders, "He went to work this morning and never came home!"  
  
The glass door suddenly slid open, admitting Hyde, his hair tousled, clothes slightly disarrayed, his eyes cloudy with thoughts.  
  
"Hyde, man?" Eric questioned as Kitty jumped up from her chair, her eyes anxiously glued to Hyde. He walked silently past them, heading towards the basement.  
  
"Steven honey!" Kitty laughed nervously, grabbing a napkin from the table. Hyde paused, his expression dazed as Kitty trotted over to him. "Red is not your color honey!" She whispered as she gently wiped the lipstick off his face.  
  
Hyde blinked, "Yeah, thanks Mrs. Foreman!" he whispered before turning and leaving the room.  
  
"What the hell did you do to the boy Kitty? You've turned him into Eric!" Red yelled angrily before storming out of the kitchen.  
  
"Um, mom.." Eric stood, walking over to his grinning mother. "What just happened?"  
  
Kitty sighed happily as she called out in a singsong voice, "Steven's in love!" before silently departing from the room.  
  
Eric stood their silently for a few seconds, just absorbing Kitty's words. "Okay I must be going crazy!" He declared to himself, and then suddenly bolted towards Donna's house.  
  
Next chapter..... Thanksgiving Dinner!.... 


	5. Turkey Day Surprises

The Situation... By Lady Cleo  
  
All Disclaimers apply!  
  
Recap: This is an alternate universe where Jackie never dated Kelso so lots of stuff hasn't happened.  
  
Chapter Five: Turkey Day Surprises  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence:  
  
It was a dangerous situation, but the scrawny warrior knew that it had to be done, else there would be an entirely different deadly situation latter on.  
  
Eric Foreman stood on the porch to his own hell, inside raged a pair of deadly demons. It was a situation he couldn't ignore, but a situation that wouldn't be easy to face. To his right Donna sat starring into space, Fez stood beside her, humming a little tune to himself.  
  
"Man, this totally bites! A demon grandmother, menopausal mother and whore of a sister all in gathered together in the same house!"  
  
Donna rolled her eyes, pushing herself up to face off against him, "Look Eric we have to go in there some time! We can't stay out here forever."  
  
"Sure we can! I mean what's so important about Thanksgiving day." Eric declared tossing up his hands in desperation.  
  
"The food!" Fez commented as he gazed longingly into the kitchen.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the Kitchen:  
  
Kitty continued to chop the food before her, violence flashing within the dark depths of her eyes, the knife attacking its prey violently. A few words slipped through her lips just as Hyde stepped into the kitchen, having finally escaped the torment of the living room. He caught something like, "hell..... Stupid....... Witch... Kill......." Baring his shoulders Hyde gently tapped Kitty on the shoulder. She jumped, spinning around with the knife still clutched in her head, the blade aimed at his throat.  
  
"Steven!" Kitty laughed nervously, putting the utensil back down on the cutting board. "Sorry honey, I'm just a little stressed."  
  
"Yeah Mrs. Foreman, cuz for a second there I thought you were having one of Red's flashbacks!"  
  
Kitty laughed again, busily wiping her hands on her apron before turning back to the preparations. "So Steven! We could use a little cheer over here. Why don't you invite the nice little Burkhart girl! She was just the sweetest thing that night."  
  
An escape. It was his chance to get out of this house, to run for freedom.  
  
"Sure Mrs. Foreman. In fact why don't I drive over their right now and ask."  
  
"Steven Honey, why don't you just call her?" Mrs. Foreman quietly asked, never noticing the fact that Hyde was already inching towards the glass doors.  
  
Hyde paused only for a second to think of a quick reply. "You know, it's....... more romantic this way. Bye!" It two seconds he was out the door, past Foreman, Fez and Donna and half way to Jackie's house.  
  
Kitty paused her work for a second, gazing after Hyde's smoking trial with a thoughtful expression on her face. "If only the other rotten basterds in this household were as thoughtful as that one!"  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Burkhart Residence:  
  
Hyde pulled up to Jackie's house, his gaze immediately flying to the expensive car parked in the drive way. The front door was wide open, a butler, or maybe it was a chaffer, was carrying some suitcases out to the open trunk. Hyde raised an eyebrow as he stepped inside, bypassing another suitcase that sat in the hallway. He made his way silently into the living room, pausing at the sight of Jackie sitting forlornly on the couch, the phone pressed to her ear.  
  
"But daddy!" He heard her whisper into the phone "You just got back........" He watched her silently pluck at her dress, her frown deepening. "But it's Thanksgiving!" Her voice dropped more, her entire face giving away the disappointment she felt, the loneliness that had her on the verge of tears. "I understand Daddy....... Okay Daddy, I love you, bye." Jackie hung the phone up. She sat there for a second, staring into space. Fluffy Cakes barked, reaching down Jackie gently picked him up, cradling the puppy in her lap.  
  
Hyde heard the front door gently slam behind him, watched as Jackie winced at the sound. A part of him wanted to react to her pain, to hold her, but just like him Jackie was proud. She didn't want anybody's pity.  
  
"What are you doing for dinner tonight?" He asked, leaning causally against the wall.  
  
Jackie jumped, turning slightly in her seat so she could gaze at him with a shocked expression. "Steven?" She squealed happily, gently placing Fluffy Cakes on the ground as she quickly raced over to him, throwing her arms around his neck and clinging tightly to his form. "When did you show up?" She asked, burying her face into his neck. "I wasn't planning on seeing you today." She added quietly as her fingers lightly traced along his muscles.  
  
"Good to see you too babe!" He chuckled, his hand snaking around the back of her neck as he placed a gentle kiss on the top of her head. He held her in his arms, gently cradling her, letting her soak up some comfort. "What gives?" He questioned, finally releasing her small form. "You look kind of down." Jackie shrugged her shoulders, her hand neatly fitting into his.  
  
Hyde let her silence pass, understanding that she probably didn't want to tell him, as he led her towards the couch. He slouched down unto the comfortable material, pulling her down to his lap. "So what are you doing for dinner? Mrs. Foreman thought of you and asked me to invite you." He declared, his hand tracing along her leg, eyes avoiding hers.  
  
Jackie's head titled as she gazed down at him, "She did?" she asked a small smile slipping across her lips. "Ah, Steven I would love to come! But maybe I shouldn't, what about your friends? I mean, what are they going to think when you bring a cheerleader to dinner?"  
  
"Like I care what they think!" Hyde snorted, and then frowned when Jackie's smile vanished. "Look baby, I don't care what they think, and neither should you. So go do whatever girly thingy you need to do so we can get back to hell!"  
  
"Hell?" Jackie inquired with a raised eyebrow.  
  
"Don't ask Baby! Don't ask!"  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence:  
  
Kitty tugged uncomfortably at her collar. Eric, Donna and Fex had finally come inside. The three stood at the bottom of the steps, watching the adults mingle around the table set up in the dinning room. She glanced nervously down at her watch. Steven had been gone for a good thirty minutes. Dinner wasn't going to be ready for another hour or two, but she'd run out of things to do in the kitchen. If Hyde brought Jackie over she could at least get the nice little girl to district her demon mother from nagging.  
  
The door bell rang. "I'll get it" Kitty laughed nervously as she raced over to the door.  
  
She flung the door open wide. Hyde and Jackie stood on the doorstep, his arm thrown casually around her waist as she leaned into his shoulder smiling nervously.  
  
"What the hell?" "The world is ending!" "Holy mother of God!" Came the three voices from just at the bottom of the stairs.  
  
Kitty glared at the three shell shocked teenagers, stepping back as Hyde lead Jackie into the house, his hand gripping hers tightly. "It's good to see you again Jackie!" Kitty laughed nervously. "Everyone I want to introduce Jackie Burkhart, Steven's girlfriend."  
  
"What the hell?" "The world really is ending!" "Holy mother of God!" Repeated the three voices from just at the bottom of the stairs.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence the basement, the circle:  
  
Foreman: (Shakes his head.) What the hell is going on up there? Cuz I swear I must be hallucinating. Did our Hyde just bring a cheerleader to dinner? Okay sure she's a hot little cheerleader, but she's the DEVIL man!  
  
Donna: A cheerleader, a fricken cheerleader. What the hell is he thinking?  
  
Fez: What the hell is he thinking! It's was my turn to date the Snow Queen!  
  
Schotize sits on the couch, chewing on a bone.  
  
Foreman: You now this is just like that time is Star Wars when.... (Eric's voice is drowned out by the moans.)  
  
Donna: The freaking Snow Queen. He's dating Point Place's Snow Queen! She's the freaking Captain of the Cheerleader, their little ring leader. I mean she's never dated anyone but the most popular, and now she's with Hyde? What the hell are they thinking?  
  
Fez: The world will end and I'll never have my turn because Hyde stole my only chance.  
  
Schotize sits on the couch, gnawing away at a bone.  
  
Foreman: How the hell did this happen? How the hell could we not have noticed? Okay so they showed absolutely no signs at school, but still shouldn't we have known just by the simple fact that.. um that.. So okay we couldn't have known so we couldn't have prevented this tragedy but still I mean.. (bangs head down.)  
  
Donna: She's a cheerleader, the Snow Queen. For heaven's sake she's Jackie Burkhart, the perfectly perfect freaken Queen of Point Place High. How could he do this to us?  
  
Fez: He doesn't deserve to live! The backstabber!  
  
Schotize jumps down from the couch and trots out of the room.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence:  
  
Jackie and Hyde stood together at the bottom of the stairs with Bob and Red. "So?" Bob began. "Do you know Councilman Burkhart?"  
  
"Bob you idiot!" Red barked glaring at his neighbor. "She's his daughter!"  
  
"Really? Wow she looks nothing like him!" Bob nodded. Red rolled his eyes and walked away, Bob following after him. "What did I say?"  
  
Fez, Donna and Eric silently entered from the kitchen. "Okay Donna!" Eric whispered. "Remember, divide and conquer. You're Princess Leia; you've been captured by Darth Vader and you have to make sure she doesn't come down while we try and rescue Obi Wan.  
  
Fantasy..  
  
Everything in the room takes on a metallic look, while staying the same. The group of adults turns into Storm Troopers..  
  
Hyde stands at the bottom of the stairs dressed as Obi wan, causally sipping from a beer. At his side stands a short female Darth Vader. She lifts up the helmet and takes a deep breath! "God I can't breathe in that thing!" Jackie declares. "So Obi Wan, want to join the dark side so we can make out?"  
  
Hyde shrugs his shoulder with a smirk. "Sure Vader, I'd love to get you out of that cape!" Hyde wraps his arm around her, crushing her to his chest as they kiss.  
  
"Oh that's just wrong!" Eric declares as he stands dressed as Luke shaking his head in misery. Donna, dressed as Princess Leia nods her head in agreement and Fez as Han Solo growls low in his throat. "It's up to you Leia. I think you'd better take Chewbacca with you for protection!" Donna nodded, bending down she picked up Schotize a.k.a. Chewbacca and headed over to Vader and Obi wan.  
  
"Wanna go upstairs and have a little girl talk Darth Vader?"  
  
"Really?" Jackie asks eagerly. "Sure Princess Leia, maybe I could give you some tips on how to dress better. You know that white dress, and that hair style makes you look just like an imperial lumberjack."  
  
A storm trooper suddenly walks over, removing its helmet to revile Laurie. "Count me in. I've got to see this!" The three girls head upstairs.  
  
"So Obi Wan! Why don't we head back to the Millennium Falcon and have a nice little talk?" Eric declared solemnly.  
  
"What?" Hyde demanded angrily.  
  
End fantasy..  
  
"If anyone I'm Han Solo! Not that old freak Obi Wan. And what exactly do you consider the Millennium Falcon. Is it the Vista Cruiser, the El Camino?" Hyde demanded.  
  
Eric rolled his eyes, glancing at Fez for support, only to find his support giving Hyde a murderous glare. "Die you basterd! You stole my turn!" Fez lunged for Hyde.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, Laurie's Room:  
  
Laurie sits there, casually playing with her nails.  
  
Donna nods her head, obviously trying to find something to say.  
  
Schotize lays on a pillow, napping.  
  
Jackie: So.. You're the girl that's totally in love with the scrawny boy!  
  
Laurie: (Disgusted) You're still not over Eric! What did you ever see in him?  
  
Donna: What? How did you know that?  
  
Schotize continues to nap.  
  
Jackie: Donna it's obvious, the entire School knows it. It's like that one time, when Cynthia was stalking Rodger, but this time it's as if Cynthia was stalk Rodger and Rodger was stalking Cynthia at the same time.  
  
Laurie: (Confused) What?  
  
Donna: (Trying to change the subject.) So you and Hyde?  
  
Schotize wakes for a second, shifts positions and goes back to napping.  
  
Jackie: (Happily) Yeah! I love Steven and he loves me!  
  
Laurie: Steven? Who's Steven? Is that Hyde?  
  
Donna: He lets you call him Steven?  
  
Schotize continues to nap.  
  
Jackie: Of course, why would I call him by his last name? That's just stupid. If I called him Hyde all the time like everybody else, he would have to call me Burkhart, and why would he call me Burkhart when he loves me?  
  
Laurie: So have you and Hyde done it yet?"  
  
Donna: (Disgusted) I don't want to know that. Hyde's one of my friends!  
  
Schotize continues to nap.  
  
Jackie: (To Laurie) God why would you ask that? I'm a virgin!  
  
Laurie: What?  
  
Donna: You're a virgin?  
  
Schotize gets up, annoyed by the noise and jumps off the bed.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the basement, the circle:  
  
Eric: She's a cheerleader, the Snow Queen, the captain of the varsity squad. She hangs out with other demons. Didn't you read all the signs?  
  
Hyde sits reading a magazine, ignoring Eric.  
  
Fez: How could you steal her like that?  
  
Hyde turns the page, continuing to read.  
  
Eric: I can't believe you let her take you over to the dark side.  
  
Hyde frowns, obviously not liking where this was going, but still not reacting.  
  
Fez: How could you do it? You knew I wanted her, you knew it was my turn?  
  
Hyde turns the page, raising an eyebrow at something he's reading.  
  
Eric: Man she's like Darth Vader.  
  
Hyde: (Throws down the magazine angrily.) What do you care Foreman. I'm the one that's dating her, not you. For the past thirty minutes I've listened to you two talk about how what were doing is wrong. And you know what! I honestly don't give a damn. If I wanna make out with someone you consider the Devil I will. (Hyde leaves.)  
  
Fez: That's right run you turn stealer.  
  
Eric: (Sarcastically) That went well!  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the kitchen:  
  
Hyde stormed into the kitchen and paused, noticing Kitty standing over by her chopping black, he tries to quietly walk past, but Kitty hears and turns on him. "What's wrong Steven?"  
  
Damn how did the woman now everything! "Eric, Fez and Donna, obviously don't like her! I don't car about what they think but they are my friends and if Jackie and I ever go public about this whole dating thing she's going to want someone on our side and I know her friends defiantly won't be." Hyde explained as Kitty led him over to the kitchen table. "Mrs. Foreman I don't want Jackie to get hurt and I know the fact that they don't like her is going to hurt her."  
  
"That's not true Steven! I'm sure they love her!" Kitty laughed, patting him on the shoulder.  
  
The kitchen door burst open, admitting an obviously unhappy Donna. She stormed over to the table, "You're dating a virgin! You're dating the captain of the cheerleading Squad, the reigning Snow Queen that won't stop calling me a lumberjack! This is like the freaken twilight zone!" That finally off her chest Donna stormed off towards the basement.  
  
"Oh honey!" Kitty whispered, Hyde seemed unaffected by the outburst. "We'll you know what, they don't matter. What matters is that you like her! You know what I'm going to do...." Hyde raised an eyebrow. "We'll your going to find out mister, just you wait."  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence:  
  
Everyone was gathering together slowly in the living room, food had been piled onto both the kid table and adult table. Kitty stood, doing last minute preparations as everyone started to take their seats. "Wait Laurie, I want you at the kiddy table!" She ordered.  
  
"Mother?" Laurie demanded, but at the menopausal look her mother gave her did as ordered.  
  
"Jackie honey, you come sit over here beside me! Hyde you sit beside her and Bob you're on the other side." No body moved for a second, at least none of the teenagers complied. "NOW!" Kitty shouted and the room went into a flurry of action. Once everyone was seated Kitty laughed nervously. "That's better."  
  
Dinner began.  
  
Kitty laughed happily as the entire table began to chat, Red and Steven talking about the football game, Jackie answering Bob's Question, while Burt and Bea made additional comments.  
  
The perfectly perfect Jackie Burkhart smiled happily at her bad boy, bad ass Steven Hyde. The world of the adult table went happily along. While those gathered at the kid table exchanged baffled glances, wondering when their new skewed reality of the world had become the normal comfortable situation of the adult table. 


	6. M Kelso…… Left in the Dark

The Situation . By Lady Cleo  
  
All Disclaimers apply!  
  
Note: This is an alternate universe where Jackie never dated Kelso so lots of stuff hasn't happened. For example Jackie never set Donna up with Casey so Donna and Eric never got back together.  
  
Chapter Six: M. Kelso.... Left in the Dark  
  
Point Place High was getting desperate. The perfect little Jackie Burkhart remained dateless. And when Jackie was dateless, the schools gossip died down to little unimportant tidbits.  
  
One off which included the notorious Steven Hyde, the bad ass, bad boy rebel of Point Place High. It was a well known fact that when Steven Hyde walked the halls he walked alone. That was nothing new. But for the past three days since the return from the Thanksgiving break Steven Hyde had spoken little, if at all, to those other people commonly associated as his friends.  
  
When Kelso was asked about the situation he replied, "I don't know what's going on thanks to Pam!"  
  
Pam's angry reply to this, "Well I'm sorry Kelso, but I will not be subjected to being in the same presence of that slut Laurie Foreman."  
  
"But baby," Kelso had whined in reply, "We obviously missed something good."  
  
Pam's response..... A slap in the shoulder as she yelled, "Yeah right, you just wanted to see that slut Laurie."  
  
Donna reported this wide spread news to the group, that scrawny boy's response, "What the hell do they care if he's not talking to us."  
  
As more days went bye man pretty Michael Kelso quizzed each and every basement occupant on the weekend's event. Their responses... "Ask Hyde."  
  
Hyde's response..... Silence.  
  
The entire group, minus M. Kelso, knew the reason for Hyde's silence on the matter. It was obvious, when you tell Kelso the sky is blue, he tells Pam the sky is blue, who in turn tells Cynthia the sky is blue. Cynthia tells Rodger, who tells Betty, who tells the freshman cheerleading squad, who then passes it unto the varsity squad who tells the football players. The football players tell the student body president who tells the student council who tells the chess club who passes it unto the nerds who causal mentions it to the bullies while being pounded. The bullies then spread the news to the juvenile delinquents who casually mention it to Donna who tells the basement. By the end of a school day, the entire school knows the sky is blue thanks to M. Kelso, man pretty, man whore.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence:  
  
Hyde walked down the stairs quietly, half expecting to find the basement devoid of life, which it was not. Foreman and Donna stood, waiting patently for his arrival, Fez sat quietly on the couch. It looked like a police interrogation to Hyde.  
  
"Look Hyde..." Foreman started to say.  
  
Hyde raised an eyebrow, slipping into his usual chair, "If this is about Jackie being Darth Vader, and the devil I've already heard it."  
  
Foreman rolled his eyes, looking to Donna for support. "Hyde I'm not going to say that she isn't the devil or that she isn't a force of the dark side...."  
  
"What Eric is trying to say is that were sorry but we can't help not liking your little girlfriend." Donna interrupted, already foreseeing where Eric's conversation had been headed.  
  
"She's not my girlfriend. I don't believe in that whole conformist girlfriend, boyfriend crap." Hyde declared, "But she's going to be around me a lot so you're going to half to get over your whole attitude towards her."  
  
Eric threw his arms up expatriated, Donna smacked him on the shoulder before turning back to Hyde, "Look we won't ever really like her but if our hating her costs us your friendship we'll pretend like we don't hate her." Donna reluctantly acceded. "But," she added quickly, "Only when you guys are around. We reserve the right to burn her behind your back!"  
  
"Whatever!" Hyde replied then smirked, "It's a good thing that you did because Mrs. Foreman has taken a real liking to her." He stood walking over to the basement door, "Which reminds me Eric, your mom invited her over for dinner."  
  
An absolute look of horror crossed Foreman's face as Hyde quickly left the basement. "What the Hell?" Donna demanded, "When we were dating Mrs. Foreman never invited me over to dinner!"  
  
"Obviously you did not get the hint Donna!" Fez quipped as he stood, heading over to the door.  
  
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Donna demanded after his retreating back, turning back to her former Foreman boyfriend Donna reluctantly took a seat. "Hey when are we going to tell Kelso?"  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the basement, the circle:  
  
Eric: Man can you imagine what it's going to be like when Kelso finds out.  
  
Eric's fantasy:  
  
Cue Music: Star Wars Theme  
  
Roll Credits:  
  
STAR WARS EPOSIDE ?  
  
OBI WAN TO THE RESCUE.  
  
HAN SOLO HAS BEEN CAPUTURED BY THE DARK FORCES. DARTH VADER PLANS TO USE THE PILOT IN HOPES OF CONVERTING HIM TO THE DARK WAYS.  
  
Cue music: Vader's theme.  
  
Cue opening scene:  
  
Hyde sits in his usual chair within a metallic cell. He is dressed as Han solo instead of Obi Wan as previously seen. The cell door opens admitting a short female Darth Vader. She walks in slowly, her masked face glued to Hyde's form as she comes to a halt in front of her prisoner "Give it up Solo! You'll never resist the powers of the dark side."  
  
"Whatever" Hyde declared as he raised his eyebrow at the short Darth Vader.  
  
"Is that what you think?" Vader questioned, the small gloved hands grasped the helmet slowly pulling the heavy black object off. Once removed Jackie tossed her hair over her shoulders in slow motion. She walked slowly over to Hyde, making a show of straddling him.  
  
"Ah damn!" Hyde cursed, obviously not resisting her anymore.  
  
"No one can resist the dark side!" Jackie grinned, then slowly leans down and kisses him, her hands slipping beneath his vest to run along his quest.  
  
The cell door suddenly burst open and in walks Kelso dressed as Obi Wan. "I've come to save you... oh sorry!" Kelso declared. "Didn't know you were busy. I'll come back later." He leaves.  
  
End fantasy....  
  
Donna: Eric I don't think anything like that would happen. I think he's going to be a little upset.  
  
Donna's fantasy: The Foreman living room, in black and white.  
  
Red and Kitty Foreman stand dressed in a 1940's fashion, Kitty is happily bouncing on her toes, waiting patiently. The kitchen door swung open, admitting Eric dressed in a world war two uniform. Donna followed after him, her face tear streaked, her lips a bright red from kisses.  
  
Eric paused in front of Red slowly extending his hand, "Well dad! Our train's leaving soon, so I guess this is goodbye for now."  
  
Red nodded taking the outstretched hand, "I'm proud of you son."  
  
Kitty started to cry as she pulled her son into a tight embrace. "Oh my little boy's going to go save the world." She finally released him when Eric started to gasp for breath.  
  
Donna walked up to Eric more tears slipping down her cheeks. "Come back to me Eric!" She started to say but then turned away from him, sobbing her heart out. The scrawny boy frowned as she gently pulled her back to him, his arms encircling her waist as he held tightly onto her form.  
  
The Kitchen door suddenly swung open, admitting Hyde, also dressed in a uniform, with Jackie clinging to his arm desperately. They walked silently over to the Foreman's.  
  
"Steven, I'm proud of you for doing what's right. I know for a second there you were debating heading for Canada, but you did the right thing." Red declared as he stepped forward to shake Hyde's hand.  
  
Kitty started to bawl again, before awkwardly attempting to hug Hyde, only to find the Jackie wouldn't release him for even a second. Kitty finally stepped back, grabbing a hold of her husband.  
  
Jackie started to sob, still clinging desperately to his form, "Ah damn, don't cry woman!" Hyde ordered as he wrapped both his arms around her small waist and crushed her protectively to his chest."  
  
"I just don't understand why you have to leave me!" She sobbed into his shoulder, her fingers tightly gripping his uniform.  
  
Hyde frowned. "Ah you're getting the uniform wet!" He declared as he pulled away from Jackie so he could gaze down into her face. "Okay look, this isn't easy for me to say, but since Donna has put me in this ridiculous situation were I could possibly be killed I'm going to say it. I love you!"  
  
Jackie started to cry harder, latching back onto his form. Hyde rolled his eyes, lifting her chin she he could gaze back down into her wet eyes he whispered quietly. "I will come back!" He slowly bent his head, pressing his lips to her gently. Jackie responded, throwing her arms around his neck she deepened the kiss as Hyde wrapped his arms around her, lifting the small girl off her feet.  
  
The kitchen door suddenly swung open admitting Kelso, also in uniform. "What the hell?" Kelso demanded forcing Hyde to pull away from Jackie. "What is my best friend doing kissing the girl I love?"  
  
Jackie shifted, melting into Hyde's side as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "And in what universe was I ever your girl?" Jackie demanded, looking ever so pissed off and annoyed at the interruption of her academy award winning performance.  
  
"Oh, right!" Kelso murmured shaking his head. "But anyway, it still hurts, cuz you know I liked you Jackie. I really wanted you and Hyde totally knew it and he went after you anyway."  
  
Jackie raised an eyebrow, "Steven never went after me! I went after him. And who can resist me?"  
  
Kelso nodded, immediately seeing her point, "Since you put it that way, I guess I'm over it." Kelso declared. "We'll I'm going to go find some other girl to make out with before we board the train."  
  
A train conductor suddenly walked down the stairs as Kelso disappears back into the Kitchen. The train crashed through the living room wall, billowing smoke. "Oh that's going to ruin the furniture." Kitty yelled angrily watching as the train continued to billow steam blasts, while it crashed through the television. "Why couldn't they have taken a boat or something?"  
  
"Yeah like that would be any better." Eric murmured under his breath, "If' we'd taken a boat half the house would be under water" Donna snickered in agreement.  
  
The conductor walked over to the group, making a show of pulling out his watch, "All aboard, this is the last call, all aboard."  
  
Jackie flung herself into Steven's arms, "Don't go."  
  
Hyde rolled his eyes, prying the small girl off and handing her over to Mrs. Kitty. "Don't worry babe, I'll be back!"  
  
Last goodbye were called out and the two soldiers boarded the trains, Hyde and Foreman stood on the steps, both their eyes glued to the small group as the train took off, billowing more furniture-ruining steam. Jackie clung to Mrs. Kitty sobbing, as Donna stood watching the now clear tracks that had passed through the Foreman living room. Several more minutes passed, the small group remained just absorbing the silence.  
  
Kelso suddenly burst into the living room. "What the hell? I missed the train! Ah damn now I'm not going to get to make out with all those hot foreign chicks."  
  
End fantasy.  
  
Fez: No, you've got it all wrong!  
  
Fez's fantasy:  
  
Fez steps out into a spot light, "I see something more American, something that just says drama." The lights come up to revel that Fez is standing in the middle of a desert town, dressed as a cowboy. Behind him loomed the sheriff's office and just a few feet away a pristine church rose against the blue sky.  
  
Kitty and Red exited from the church, their eyes going wide at the sight of all the sand. "Oh my god!" Kitty yelled, half horrified, half angry. "We'll never get rid of all this sand, and where's my furniture?" She demanded before storming back into the church. Red followed after her, mumbling about stupid dumb asses and their stupid fantasies.  
  
Hyde suddenly stepped out of the Sheriff's office, dressed for his part as the local sheriff with a black cowboy hat on his head. He slowly walked over to Fez, "Man, are you sure you want me as sheriff? Wouldn't I be better as some really cool outlaw who storms into town and steals the heart of the local girl?"  
  
Fez shook his head, "This is my fantasy you turn stealer."  
  
Jackie appeared down the street walking towards them in a gingham dress and bonnet, carrying a basket laden with food. She walked angrily over to Hyde and thrust the basket out. "Here I slaved over a fire to make your freaken lunch. And Fez, can we have a little wardrobe change, this dress just isn't working for me."  
  
Fez growled angrily, "This is my fantasy, now do as told!"  
  
"Fine!" Jackie barked as she turned to face Hyde, who was gingerly picking through the basket. Jackie rolled her eyes and took a deep breath before she started to speak in a monotone, "Oh my handsome husband, my sheriff, I've missed you so much."  
  
"Do it with a little feeling woman!" Fez barked, throwing his hat down for emphases.  
  
Jackie rolled her eyes and put on a fake smile as she joyfully cried out, "Oh my handsome husband! My sheriff! I've missed you so much!" Stepping closer to Hyde she threw her arms around him and pulled him into a shocking kiss.  
  
Eric and Donna rode up on a pair of black horses, Donna trying to fix her low cut saloon girl dress, while Eric sat dressed in black and melting under the heat.  
  
"Where's Kelso?" Fez demanded looking down the streets, obviously getting rather pissed off.  
  
Eric tugged at his collar, pointing down the way they'd just come. Kelso was a ways down the street clinging desperately to a horse, obviously terrified of the beast.  
  
"Oh guys! Bandit gang! I need a little help here!" Kelso called, Eric rolled his eyes. Turning his own horse Eric galloped down the street and returned a second later leading his fearsome bandit leader, who sat clinging to his horse, terrified.  
  
"Kelso just get off the damn horse!" Donna ordered, hiking up the bust line of her dress once again.  
  
The man pretty bandit did as suggested, slowly sliding down the horse. Once his feet hit the ground, his confidence magically reappeared. He walked slowly over to where Hyde and Jackie stood, "Look here sheriff! I've had eyes on that woman of yours long before you ever noticed how hot she is."  
  
"So!" Hyde declared, obviously unaffected by the chaffing group of bandits dressed in black.  
  
"We'll I reckon I'll just take her then if you don't mind." Kelso laughed, Eric rolled his eyes, tugging once again at his collar. Donna was too busy trying to keep her dress from revealing too much to even notice the events.  
  
"Whatever!" Was the only reply, as Hyde wrapped his arms protectively around his little woman.  
  
Kelso laughed manically once again, obviously enjoying his roll. He quickly pulled out his gun and fired.  
  
And missed Hyde by a couple of miles!  
  
Hyde rolled his eyes, "Come on Jacks. Let's go eat!" Turning the pair entered the sheriff office, shutting the door behind them.  
  
"You think they have air conditioning in there?" Eric asked, "Cuz if they do I have no qualms about joining their side. Maybe he needs a deputy!"  
  
"That's not how it's supposed to end!" Kelso yelled angrily but stopped when Pam Macy suddenly walked by. Dressed as a saloon girl! "We'll hello pretty lady!" Kelso called, following after her.  
  
End fantasy  
  
Jackie sits there quietly on Hyde's lap, both of them staring at the three other teenagers like they've each gained another head.  
  
Hyde: What the hell are you on?  
  
Jackie: Okay Donna, Fez, you had some pretty good, but twisted ideas. Eric, well yours was just wrong. Personally I see something more along this way...  
  
Jackie's fantasy:  
  
Jackie stands in the middle of a field picking flowers. Hyde suddenly rides up on a white horse, dressed in shinning armor.  
  
"Milady!" He calls out, jumping down from the horse and embracing her. "At last I have found thee."  
  
End fantasy.  
  
Eric: Okay where was Kelso's part in that story.  
  
Donna: Maybe he was the horse!  
  
Fez: No Donna, do not be ridiculous! He was the flowers that Jackie was picking and tossing aside.  
  
Hyde grinned.  
  
Jackie: No one said that man whore Kelso had to be in it!  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence:  
  
The dinner table was quiet, Laurie sat silently beside Eric, her glare fixed on Jackie, who paid no attention to the blond slut but happily chatted away with Kitty. The rest of the table continued to eat silently.  
  
Laurie leaned over to Eric quietly whispering, "What's Hyde's little virgin doing here?"  
  
Eric glared at his demon sister, and suddenly paused, his gaze flickering between Jackie and Laurie. "You don't like her?" He questioned, obviously shocked, after all he was under the impression that sluts like them usually bonded.  
  
"Of course not, she's a little goody-two-shoe virgin who called me the whore of Point Place and threatened to tell the world about the kind of diseases I spread if I ever so much as looked at Hyde." She paused for a second, "Why the hell I'm I telling you this." Laurie suddenly declared before turning back to dinner.  
  
The world Eric saw seemed to morph..  
  
Old View:  
  
Darth Vader sat beside Han Solo with his arm causally draped around her shoulders. The Emperor Red laughed at one end of the table, while Kitty sat at the other end of the table dressed as an Imperial general. Beside him his storm trooper sister grumbled about that slut Darth Vader.  
  
New View:  
  
The Emperor Red still sat at the end of the table, Kitty still laughed but know seemed to be in her better mood, making her a Rebel general. Hyde was still Han Solo with his arm still draped over Jackie. But Jackie was no longer dressed as Vader; instead she was a rebel fighter pilot smiling happily at her Solo. For a second Eric didn't dare look at Laurie but then suddenly found the curiosity overwhelming. He found Darth Vader occupying the chair beside him..  
  
Eric nearly jumped out of his chair, Darth Vader suddenly turned to him asked, "What the hell are you looking at me like that for?"  
  
Next Chapter: The Not So Typical, Typical Foreman Christmas. 


	7. The Not So Typical, Typical Foreman Chri...

The Situation . By Lady Cleo  
  
This one's for Chase and everyone else who continued to review even though my lazy ass hadn't written chapter seven yet.  
  
All Disclaimers apply!  
  
Note: This is an alternate universe where Jackie never dated Kelso so lots of stuff hasn't happened. For example Jackie never set Donna up with Casey so Donna and Eric never got back together.  
  
Chapter Seven: The Not So Typical, Typical Forman Christmas.  
  
Everything in Point Place High tended to revolve around one certain brunette and her preppy group of followers. However since the widely discussed breakup of the perfectly perfect Burkhart and the well known ass Chip things had started to change. Jackie Burkhart was slowly but surely slipping into the background, evolving to a higher form of normal. Cynthia and Rodger were now the big news, their constant on again off again romance was the only thing to be talking about. They had even become bigger then Pam and Kelso.  
  
Of course that didn't really mean anything. Everyone knew, that sooner or later Jackie Burkhart would return to the spotlight, dragging some handsome jock with her. Some where begging to doubt just when that would be. Especially after Pam told them all about the after school shock she'd just received.  
  
Pam swore she witnessed it all.  
  
The story goes like this:  
  
It was after cheerleading practice and Jackie and Pam had gone to drop off some books at there lockers, not wanting to drag the books home for Christmas. Well Pam and her small bladder had to run off to the nearest bathroom. Just as the leggy blond was about to round a corner she saw Kevin, the handsome quarter back walk slowly up to the perfectly perfect cheerleader. At this point Pam was about to freak out, her thoughts over brimmed with possibilities. Not wanting to interrupt a possible life altering moment the blond remained hidden around the corner.  
  
Kevin causally mentioned that he and Anna, his long time girlfriend, had recently spilt and he was dateless for the Christmas dance that night. Then he asked Jackie if maybe she would like to go with him. That's when that Hyde fellow and two of his little followers appeared down the hall, absolutely frightening Pam, they could like totally ruin this moment for Jackie. Anyway Kevin then asked the brunette is she had a date for the coming Christmas dance. Pam was overjoyed, her eyes sparkling with visions of the next biggest power couple since Jackie went out the senior class president last year. Hyde was looking livid down the hall, like he was about to attack some one, but Pam ignored that, focusing on the potential power couple.  
  
Jackie seemed to pause for a second and glanced down the hall, where Pam noticed that Donna and Eric were holding back a murderous Hyde, about ready to charge down the hall and kill somebody.  
  
Then, horror of all horrors, Jackie Beulah Burkhart smiled her typical 'you're not worthy of my time' pity smile and told the drop dead gorgeous hunk that she had already made plans with someone else. Pam couldn't tell them what happened next, on account of the fact that she fainted as soon as the words slipped out of Burkhart's perfect lips.  
  
Rodger was convinced that Burkhart had caught some kind of rare disease that skewed the thought process. Cynthia was sure that Jackie was dating some handsome movie star or teenage model.  
  
Pam's reply to this, "I think maybe I should dump Kelso since Kevin's free."  
  
Jackie Burkhart was suddenly forgotten.  
  
********** The Situation. Point The Burkhart Residence:  
  
The tinsel had been tossed, the tree decorated with brilliant silver ornaments. The entire house brimmed with the Christmas spirit. The wreaths were hung; family Christmas cards sent out and the presents wrapped. The only thing missing was the picture perfect family. and Jackie didn't want to think about that.  
  
She sat quietly on the couch listening to the wafting sound of a Christmas record. Her eyes intently focused in on her toes as she painted them a bright Christmas red. Fluffy cakes lay underneath the tall pine, his eyes intently focused in on a bobbing Christmas ornament. Outside the snow continued to pile up, the white flakes trickled down the window, making it a picture perfect Christmas.  
  
She smiled as she gazed down at her drying nails, a perfect match with any of her Christmas outfits. The doorbell suddenly buzzed, startling the girl out of her admiration over the red toes. For a second she puzzled over wither or not she was hearing things, when the door bell rang again. Jackie bolted off the couch and down the hall, Fluffy Cakes on her heels. With a wide grin she pulled the door open, planning on bestowing Steven with a multitude of kisses, but then found that plan to be quiet impossible.  
  
"Mrs. Foreman!"  
  
Kitty Foreman stood in the doorway, covered from head to toes in warm jackets and layers, a plate of wrapped cookies in her hand, and a bright frozen smile plastered on her face. Jackie quickly stepped aside allowing the older woman entrance into the warmth.  
  
Kitty laughed nervously as she handed the plate of cookies over to the younger girl. "Hello Jackie."  
  
"You look frozen Mrs. Foreman, um would you like a cup of coffee or something?" Jackie smiled, nervous over how she should treat a potential, desired mother in law. "Oh honey I would love to, but I still have forty more Christmas cards to deliver, I just wanted to give you these cookies and invite you and your dad over for our annual Christmas Eve party!" Kitty laughed again.  
  
Panic overwhelmed Jackie for just a second, but a quick snap decision seemed like an easy fix. "I would love to come, but I'll have to ask my father's secretary if she can make some time for him when he gets back."  
  
Kitty's head jerked back, and she laughed nervously, random ideas about the Councilman whereabouts popping into her head as she headed back over towards the door. "Yes, you do that, and I'll just clear a place for him just in case he can come."  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the kitchen:  
  
Red Foreman came home from a hard day of working, he was tired and ready for a quiet afternoon spent with his newspaper and no kids.  
  
All plans were suddenly cancelled when he walked through the sliding glass door. "Red!" Kitty yelled storming into the kitchen angrily. "You'll never believe what I found out today. That idiot councilman we elected is neglecting his daughter."  
  
Red rolled his eyes, dropping his briefcase by the door as he slipped out of his jacket. Councilman Burkhart wasn't a bad guy; after all he had managed to keep the plant open, ensuring Red his job. For a while there Red had been forced to imagine himself working in some idiotic job, something like a Pricemart manager.  
  
"I went over to see Jackie and invite the two of them over to our Christmas Eve party."  
  
"What the hell did you do that for Kitty? That squeaky annoying girl never shuts up! And the councilman, sure he saved the plant but I don't want to have to carry on a conversation with him."  
  
"Well that good, because that cold uncaring basterd is not coming! What kind of father goes off for two month's leaving their only child alone in that big house while her mother whores around the Caribbean?" Kitty demanded angrily.  
  
An idea popped into Red's mind, and idea that he knew Kitty had already had. "No!" Red yelled angrily. "We are not an orphanage! We do not take in every kid that needs a new home."  
  
A fire lit up within the depth of Kitty's eyes, a fire ignited by the flames of menopause. "Red Foreman if you don't have the heart to take in a little girl, freezing in that monstrous home, lonely and probably starving slowly to death then I'm not sure your the man I want to be married too anymore." With a final angry, yet tearful sniffle Kitty stormed out of the room.  
  
Red stood there for a second cursing himself when Hyde suddenly burst into kitchen, Eric and Kelso dragging behind him. "This is your fault, you Dumbass! You just had to date a high society loudmouth with a deadbeat dad." That off his chest Red stormed after his over-emotional wife.  
  
"Man what was he talking about?" Kelso laughed, Eric and Hyde exchanged a brief glance before shrugging their shoulders. "Eric man I think your dads been smoking something!"  
  
"No, he's probably just having a flashback." Eric declared walking over to the fridge. "So Kelso what are you doing now that Pam dumped you for Kevin."  
  
"Man you just had to bring that up didn't you!" Kelso mumbled slouching into a nearby chair.  
  
Hyde snickered, "Man that must have been some sight, Pam Macy dumping you in front of half the school."  
  
Kelso sulked lower into his chair. "Parents decided that we needed to visit the grandparents. So I'm getting out of here for two weeks among the Florida chicks." Kelso laughed suddenly perking up. "Leaving you two losers by yourselves!"  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Burkhart Residence:  
  
Jackie sat quietly, watching Mrs. Foreman pace around her living room, Fluffy Cakes napping quietly on the couch. She'd been pacing the room for only a few minutes, but already Jackie was beginning to worry about whatever was making the older woman nervous.  
  
"Is there something wrong with Steven Mrs. Foreman?" Jackie asked quietly her heart jumping with fear at the very idea.  
  
Kitty laughed nervously taking a seat beside the girl. "No, it's not Steven." She started to say, when an idea suddenly popped into her head and she laughed nervously. "It's just that Laurie called a few days ago and told us she's thinking of coming home for Christmas. And we'll she's always had a thing for Steven," Jackie sat up, her full attention now focused in on Kitty. "And I'm a little afraid that since he's dating you now she'll be even more attracted to him."  
  
A red hue seemed to suddenly overwhelm Jackie's vision.  
  
Kitty smiled nervously as she continued on, "So I was thinking that maybe if you came and stayed with us until your father returns you can stay in her room and she won't want to come home for Christmas." Kitty waited anxiously watching the younger woman eagerly.  
  
"Give me thirty minutes to pack!"  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence:  
  
Eric walked down the hallway quietly, his mind entirely focused on a certain red head as he passed the devil's room.  
  
"Hey Eric!"  
  
The voice barely managed to pass through his consciousness as he continued walking. "Hey Jackie." He finally managed to call back as he continued down the hall. It took a second for his reply to finally hit his brain. "Jackie?" Turning around Eric cautiously approached the room. Jackie and Mrs. Foreman were busy packing up Laurie's belongings, redecorating the room with all of Jackie's pink fluffy things. "Mom?"  
  
Kitty looked up from the pile of stuffed animals. "Of Eric honey, Jackie's going to be staying with us for a while!"  
  
Eric stood there for a second, stupefied. "Um, when did this happen? And why didn't anybody tell me?"  
  
Kitty didn't seem to hear her son, as Jackie was adamantly explaining where she'd gotten several of her stuffed animals, and aphetically listing their names.  
  
"Hey Foreman, Red's outside yelling Dumbass, so I'm guessing he wants to talk to you!" Hyde called as he climbed up the stairs. "Hey Foreman, stop standing there looking like a stupefied pigeon and go answer the man." When no answer came from the scrawny boy Hyde headed over to see just what had transfixed him.  
  
"Steven!"  
  
Two seconds later Hyde found his arms full of the soft subtle cheerleader as she peppered his face with kisses. Hyde blinked trying to fully understand what exactly was happening. "Uh, Jackie, what's going on?"  
  
Jackie finally pulled away from him, her large eyes gazing up into his. "I'm protecting you!" That said, she placed a brief kiss on his lips and trotted back into the room.  
  
Hyde blinked; baffled and confused he turned and started to walk away. "Wait a minute? Protecting me from what? How is she going to protect me?"  
  
"By moving in!" Eric muttered, and then started walking towards the distant cry of "Dumbasses get down here now!"  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the basement, the circle:  
  
Hyde: Man this is freaking weird, Jackie's going to be around all the time, every day, every night. (Pauses, then smirks) all night!  
  
Eric: Man this is going to bite, can you imagine her hanging around twenty- four seven. Man, I was just getting used to her being the whole Jedi pilot instead of Darth Vader.  
  
Fez: (Grins) Eric, do you mind if I sleep over tonight. Can you imagine Jackie walking around Bra-less?  
  
Hyde: Hey, that's my girlfriend you're talking about! But yes I can imagine that. this is going to rock.  
  
Eric: No, no this is going to suck. Man and I thought Laurie was bad, but this is going to be like twelve times worse.  
  
Fez: (Grins) I can just see it now, she will fall desperately in love with me when she sees the glory of Fez twenty four hours a day!  
  
Hyde: (Glares at Fez) Hey that's my girlfriend you're talking about!  
  
Eric: Where are the girls?  
  
Fez: Jackie took Donna shoe shopping.  
  
Hyde: What?  
  
Eric: Donna shoe shopping?  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. Point Place Mall:  
  
Donna stood watching quietly as Jackie tried on her fourteenth pair of shoes. How the hell had the little brunette managed to talk her into this ridiculous trip. This was the fourth shoe store they had visited, and Jackie had already bought three pairs of shoes. "Jackie, I hate to interrupt your little love affair with shoes, but why exactly did you bring me along?"  
  
Jackie looked up from the black heels she was trying on. "We'll I figured that if I'm going to be staying with the Foreman's until daddy comes back I have to do something about you and the scrawny boy."  
  
"There's nothing wrong with Eric and me, were great friends!" Donna defended walking over to the pile of discarded shoes. She took a seat beside them and started digging through the pile, convinced that she could find at least one pair that looked exactly like the ones Jackie was trying on right now.  
  
Jackie laughed, "If everything fine then why do you two mope around stalking each other, waiting for the other one to act."  
  
Donna glared quietly, trying to remind herself that murder wasn't legal in Wisconsin, no matter how clever the murderess was.  
  
"So here's what I'm going to do for you!" Jackie declared tossing aside yet another pair of shoes. "I'm going to help you work out your problems with that scrawny boy. "  
  
"And just how are you going to do that?" Donna demanded.  
  
"I've got the perfect plan."  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the basement, Christmas eve:  
  
"No! The answer is a defiant no, never, over my dead body." Eric called out from his position on the couch. "I would never ever trust Jackie with my love life, or any part of my life for that matter."  
  
Hyde walked out of his back room, carrying a small white box, which he tucked into his back pocket quickly. God he felt stupid. But Kitty had absolutely insisted he get his girlfriend a Christmas present, had dragged him to the mall, practically kicking and screaming. The basement door swung open, and the two girls entered.  
  
"Um, Eric.. Can we talk outside?" Donna declared, reaching down she grabbed his hand and dragged him out the door, leaving Jackie in one corner of the room, and Hyde in the other corner.  
  
The brunette stepped forward, holding the bag in her hand out in his direction. Hyde's eyebrows furrowed as he accepted the package, peaking into the package he blinked. "Boots?" He smirked happily, pulling them out of the bag he slipped off his old shoes and quickly slipped on the boots.  
  
Jackie smiled, pleased with the gift. "Right, so shall we go upstairs and see what trouble the adults are brewing?" She started towards the stair, but Hyde didn't follow, tucking his hand into the pocket he pulled the gift out and tossed the box over his shoulder. If he had to give this to her he might as well do it with his own Zen style. Hyde reached, slipping the simple sliver chain around her neck, he quickly fastened the clasp and stepped back, watching as Jackie's face lit up.  
  
She was speech less, her finger playing with the braided chain. "Before you say anything Mrs. Foreman practically forced me." She shut him up with a kiss, not wanting his words to ruin the moment. Holding unto him tightly, she squeezed her eyes shut..  
  
The stage was lit, the black floor polished, the glittering background sparkling. Slowly the spot light swung around the stage until it landed on one small lady, Jackie Burkhart. She stood there, dressed in a long white silky dress, the skirt made up of long white feathers, wearing the simple silver chain around her neck. Her fine hair braided and piled atop her head. The music wafted in, some long forgotten tune.  
  
"Think of what you're losing, by constantly refusing to dance with me. You'd be the idol of France with me." She began spinning across the stage, allowing the spot light to travel after her shadow, as Hyde walked out, his silhouette dancing across the stage to her side.  
  
Jackie smiled, turning to him she began to sing again, "And yet you stand there and shake your foolish head rheumatically while I wait here so ecstatically. You just look and say emphatically."  
  
"Not this season. There's a reason." Hyde sang gently stepping into the light behind her. Dressed in a black tuxedo, a top hat resting gently on his head. Stepping to her side he pulled his gloves on tighter before turning to the woman.  
  
"I won't dance. Don't ask me. I won't dance. Don't ask me. I won't dance, Madame, with you. My heart won't let my feet do things they should do." Spinning away from her Hyde before gently adding, "You know what? You're lovely."  
  
"So what? I'm lovely..."  
  
"But oh, what you do to me. I'm like an ocean wave that's bumped on the shore. I feel so absolutely stumped on the floor." Reaching out he grabbed a hold of her hand, pulling the brunette to his chest.  
  
Together they danced across the floor, weaving a pattern, with twirls and quick steps. "Ah, but when you dance you're charming and you're gentle. Especially when you do The Continental. But this feeling isn't purely mental. For heaven rest us I'm not asbestos. And that's why..." He took a quick breath, lifting her gently into the air, spinning the small woman back into his arms. "I won't dance. Why should I? I won't dance. How could I? I won't dance, merci beaucoup. I know that music leads the way to romance. And if I hold you in my arms... I won't dance."  
  
"Jackie are you listening to me." His voice, not merely as melodic as before, shocked the brunette out of her stupor. "I said I think we should probably head upstairs."  
  
"Right!" Jackie agreed turning towards the stair she started up them, then froze as Laurie slowly walked down the stairs. The heavenly dream that had played across her eyes moments ago was complete forgotten as the smaller girl narrowed her eyes.  
  
"Hyde." Laurie began; Jackie lunged for the girl's throat.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. Outside the Foreman Residence:  
  
Donna stood there nervously watching as Eric slowly unwrapped the candle. "Wow a sand candle. Um, Donna didn't you get me on of these four years ago."  
  
Donna nodded an affirmative, a nervous laugh slipping past her lips. "Um, yeah I did." Silence passed as Eric continued to stare at the candle. "This is stupid."  
  
"What did you say Donna?"  
  
"Jackie talked me into this ridiculous plan just to tell you that after the whole stupid breakup thing I still like you and even though I was right I'm sorry for the whole incident.!"  
  
Eric laughed, "Wow, Jackie talked you into saying all of that?"  
  
Donna blushed awkwardly, "Well, no I was supposed to bat my eyes and look at you like I wanted you or something. The candle was supposed to do the trick." She explained, "Supposedly it worked for some girl named Cindy or something."  
  
"Yeah, Cynthia and Rodger, I heard about that. " Eric nodded, gazing down at the sand candle quietly. "So, what happens now?"  
  
"I don't know!" Donna shrugged, gazing off the porch silently, the waves of red hair blocking her face.  
  
Seconds passed in silence, only the sound of the breeze echoed across the pavement. "Donna, I" Eric began, "I love you, and I have so much to say and." Donna interrupted him, throwing her arms around Eric and shutting him up with a kiss.  
  
**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the kitchen:  
  
"Man, that was priceless." Hyde laughed as he Jackie stood silently beside each other, watching Eric and Donna hold each other. The soft strains of Christmas carols wafted in from the living room. Jackie grinned, pleased with her little matchmaking endeavor, and the bruises she had bestowed upon the elder Foreman child. Turning to him she slipped her hands around his neck, her fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck, her head resting lightly on his chest.  
  
"The way Laurie just kind of hit the ground, dude where was a camera when you need one." Hyde smiled down at the small girl as he combed through the soft brown waves of her hair with his fingers and placed a soft kiss on the top of forehead. He was trapped by her presence, the way her eyes captured his, mesmerizing his thoughts, the way his entire body shook with the beating of his heart just because she waltzed into the room. Hyde pulled back from her, arms locking around her waist, he grinned devilishly, lifting the smaller girl off the ground, and twirling her in the air. Jackie giggled, her arms clutching his upper torso tightly as her feet glided through the air.  
  
Finally setting her down Hyde smirked, "Damn woman, you're tuning me into Foreman!" he cursed, the smile that darted across his lips betraying the hard voice.  
  
Jackie laughed, shaking her head, "No, I don't want a scrawny neighbor boy, I prefer my bad ass Zen master."  
  
"Anything for you my little grasshopper." Jackie laughed at the nickname before she pulled his head down, gently pressing her lips to his. Hyde wasted no time, letting his hand resume it's caressing of the soft brown waves of hair as he gentle angled her head. He deepened the kiss, letting the other hand remain locked around her waist, gently pulling her closer.  
  
Something told him that he'd gotten far too involved, he was in far too deep, and he was enjoying it far too much. But then again, maybe being trapped wasn't such a bad thing.  
  
Note: The song, "I Won't Dance" is from the Fred Astaire and Ginger Rodger's Move "Roberta". Music by Jerome Kern and lyrics by Dorothy Fields, Oscar Hammerstein II, Otto Harbach and Jimmy McHugh.  
  
Next Chapter: Valentine's Day Blunder. 


	8. Valentine’s Day Blunder

The Situation

All Disclaimers apply! 

Note: Okay I know this one is kind of short but I've been working on it for a long time and it's never fallen into place quiet as easily as the other seven chapters.

Chapter Eight: Valentine's Day Blunder. 

The word had spread rather quickly that Jackie Burkhart was staying with the Foremans, along with several reasons why she was doing so. Cynthia said that she and Eric Foreman were like distant cousins or something. Pam quickly quelled that rumor, saying that Jackie just couldn't be related to the scrawny neighbor boy, Kelso would have said something at one point or another. Rodger thought that maybe child services had deposited Jackie there, you know with both her parents always gone. Then of course there were the rumors about Jackie dating Foremen, Donna shut those up rather quickly, only to have threesome rumors pop up in their place. 

Then there was Kelso, who was now not only single but considering himself his most man prettiest ever with a perfect Florida tan. When he came over to the house and found Kitty having tea and coffee with the beautiful sociality, he freaked out. It didn't take a second for the man to automatically assume she was there for him. He made his move faster then John Wayne could draw. Who could've guessed the brunette hit just like Hyde.

Of course that didn't really stop Michael Kelso, prettiest man whore in Point Place. Jackie was now seldom seen around the house.

Hyde had enough frustration with Red Foreman and the new house rules. With the addition of a non related female, Red decided to crack down on his rules. This included adding a few more. For example after ten o'clock Jackie Burkhart was not allowed in the basement and Steven Hyde was not allowed on the second floor. That meant no extra make out time with Jackie; in fact it rather cut down on their existing time. And god damn if the man didn't have sonar hearing and night-vision. Hyde concluded it must have be some side effects from his war experience and the government testing. 

Now Hyde was extremely pissed off. With Kelso cutting into Hyde's daytime plans with her by constantly driving the brunette to seek escape with her leggy bimbo blonde cheerleaders, he'd barely seen Jackie at all this week. And that had made for an even more moody, wisecracking, violent Hyde. He knew that no good could come from those bloodsucking blondes. All they did was try and set her up with stupid jocks. She was slowly regressing into her former evil ways, and that had to be stopped. However, the only way to do that was to either kill Kelso or tell the world that he, the bad ass Zen Master, liked making-out with a certain brunette cheerleader. 

Hyde was currently in the planning stages for project, "Murder Kelso." 

********** 

The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the basement: 

"Okay little buddy.." Foreman declared, handing the white bed sheet to the foreign exchange student the scrawny neighbor boy backed away. "Donna will distract the victim with the squeaky dog toy." Donna squeaked the small dog toy in response. 

Fez nodded "And when he comes in I am to jump him with the sheet." 

"Right! Okay everybody, take your places. Operation Restore Hyde is about to take place." Foreman ordered grabbing the foam bat as Fez nodded holding the sheet up, ready to pounce. Donna squeaked the toy a couple times in preparation. 

The door opened. "Attack!" The sheet flew over the culprit as Fez pounced, the squeaky toy was attacked by Donna's lumberjack hands and Foreman swung the foam bat, hitting the creature repeatedly. "Jackie is bad!" Donna yelled. 

"No more talking to Jackie.no more flowers, no more candies." Fez squeaked in pain at the last comment. "No more pawing Jackie!" Foreman added as he continued to beat the figure mercilessly. 

"What the hell?" Hyde's voice demanded from underneath the sheet. 

The room froze, the squeaky toy ceased its annoying squawk. 

"That was not Kelso!" Fez declared quickly backing away from the sheeted figure. 

Absolute horror crossed Foreman's face as he dropped the foam bat and kicked it under the couch, thanking god that Fez had managed to get the sheet over Hyde's head. "Abort!"  He pulled the sheet off, revealing an angry yet confused Hyde. 

"What the hell are you idiots doing? I thought you got over the whole Jackie is evil phase!" 

  
Donna sighed, "Damnit Fez. You said Kelso was coming down the stairs, you were supposed to keep an eye on Kelso." She slumped down to the couch beside the abused squeaky toy. 

"Sorry man, though Jackie will always be evil to me. even being the whole Jedi pilot and all, we where supposed to be pounding Kelso." Foreman explained taking a seat beside Donna. 

Hyde smirked, "Too bad you screwed it up." He stalked across the room, grabbing a Popsicle from the fridge before taking his custom seat. "Any of you seen Jackie lately?" Fluffy cakes trotted down the stairs, his growing legs impeding his progress. The Doberman gazed around the room, failed to spot his mistress and trotted over to Hyde, whimpering.   

"I left her with her psycho cheerleaders after school." Donna explained, "It's not looking to good. I just got someone to talk to, that is other then you losers, and now Kelso is running her off. So okay she's absolutely annoying and I can't stand half the stuff that comes out of her mouth but that's not the point." 

"Hey Mr. Foreman!" Kelso called from outside. 

"Everybody take your places!" Eric ordered grabbing the bat from underneath the couch. 

"Give me the bat Foreman! You hit like a girl!" 

****** 

  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence, the kitchen:  
  
Red Foreman sat quietly at the table, the newspaper spread out in front of him as the elder man attempted to find some quiet time to himself. The glass door creaked open, and Jackie poked her head into the door way. "Mr. Foreman is Kelso here?" 

Shouts suddenly erupted from the basement, the loud barking of Fluffy Cakes resounding off the kitchen walls along with Kelso's shouts demanding to know what was going on. "Does that answer your question?" Red questioned turning his eyes back to the paper.

Jackie sighed with frustration, stealing her shoulders she walked into the kitchen. "You know if Steven would just tell him that we're going out he'd stop his incessant pawing." The small brunette sighed taking a seat across from the older man. "I don't understand why he doesn't want to tell anybody about us. It's not like he really even cares about what they think."

Red rolled his eyes, but the only way to get her to shut up and leave him alone was to bring Steven into the picture. "Maybe you should go ask him yourself."

"You're right. I mean, I pretty and popular and beautiful, even if he was worried about what everybody would say he shouldn't want to hide the fact that were dating." Anger began boiling up within the small girl's chest. "I'm tired of his being ashamed of me or whatever is going on in that big head of his. I mean boys bow down before me, he should be grateful that I love him so much."

Red grunted, not really paying attention to the small girl, a habit he had developed over the several weeks she'd been staying with them. However, if her father didn't show up soon he was going to personally track the basterd down and give him an earful. 

"You're absolutely right Mr. Foreman. In fact I think I'm going to go talk to him right now, Kelso or no Kelso!" standing the small girl marched over to the Basement door and steeled her shoulder for a battle. 

*********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Basement:

  
Jackie walked down the stairs and took in the situation. Donna was abusing a squeaky toy while trying to contain her laugher. Foreman sat on top of what she assumed was Kelso covered in a sheet. While Fluffy Cakes chewed on the victim's shoe, Fez stood watching with an amused expression. And Steven stood holding a foam bat, laughing as he occasionally hit Kelso with the bat. They all froze at the sight of the brunette cheerleader walking down the stairs.  

"Jackie!" Hyde greeted almost cheerfully as he dropped the foam bat and started towards the small brunette. Eric reached out grabbing Hyde's arm and frantically motioning towards the covered Victim. The Zen master reappeared, Jackie frowned. 

"Steven, we need to talk now!" She declared angrily, ignoring the other people in the room she started to rant. "Look I'm tired of this whole stupid hiding crap. Look if you would just let me tell everybody about us we wouldn't have half the problems we have right now. Stupid Kelso wouldn't by incessantly pawing me and my friends would shut up about setting me up. I don't understand why you're so against us going public, is it to much to ask that we go to just one dance together, maybe do something I want to do once in a while?"

"First off," Hyde interrupted, "I don't believe in the whole boyfriend girlfriend conformist crap, so we have nothing to tell the school. Secondly I don't give a damn what those blonde bloodsucking friends are telling you."

"Don't call me friends that, I don't go around calling your friends stoners or idiots. Ugh, I don't understand why you're so afraid of telling someone other then this little group that you might actually like me. Just go to one stupid dance. That's all I'm asking!"

"Get this thru your little Easy Bake Oven head; I'm not going to any stupid school dance!" 

"Fine!" Jackie yelled angrily. "If you don't care enough about us to go to one little dance then you can consider this relationship over."  Turning on her heels she charged up the stairs. The room remained quiet as Hyde turned away walking back into his room and slamming the door shut. 

"Donna!" Jackie screeched from upstairs, the red head jumped charging after the high pitched voice, leaving the three male alones.

"Well since there's nothing to hide anymore!" Eric mused as he stood, pulling the sheet of Kelso. The man pretty man had curled into a ball and fallen asleep at some time. "What the hell?" Eric demanded. "You mean to tell me that he slept through that entire shouting session?"

Fez shrugged his shoulders. "At least now Jackie is free." The forging exchange student quipped with an odd unenthusiastic voice. "Yet for some reason this does not make me happy!"

**********  
The Situation. The Foreman Residence:

Hyde stormed angrily into the Kitchen. "That did not just happen!" He yelled, taking a seat across from Red. "I just got dumped because I don't want to attend a stupid school dance!" A small nagging voice suddenly asked if that wasn't what he wanted in the first place, wasn't she supposed to leave him thus making him free? But Hyde ignored the voice, the whole idea of being dumped because he wouldn't go to a dance ridiculous.

"You can't dance, can you?" Red demanded, startling the younger boy.

"I can dance." Hyde defended. 

"Not one step, right!" Red insisted setting his newspaper down.

"Not one step!" Hyde reluctantly admitted.

Red smirked turning his gaze towards the rebel, "Well, then you got a problem, women wanna dance." 

"What the hell for?" 

"It's something to do with that romantic stuff, plus they can get close and wiggle their bodies around in front of a man in a safe atmosphere."

"Why would I want to wiggle around in public just so she can feel all romantic?" 

"Do I really need to answer that question for you?" Red asked. "You're a man, she's a woman! You're going to be doing a whole lot of stupid stuff just to keep her around for a little longer. Now if you want, I can help you out." 

**********  
  
The Situation. The Foreman Living Room:

Kitty smiles gently at Hyde, directing his steps, "Ok, now, that was good, ok, let's try it again. Ok? Now. Left, right, left, turn and step." Hyde goes off to one side. "Ok." 

"Now! You follow me. Ok. You can do this. Ok. Left, right, left, turn and step! Ha ha! Ooh.no! No! No! Look at me, not at your feet. Ok, you know what, now, now put your arm around me. Yeah, a little bit lower, put your hand in the small of my back. You feel how you can guide me?" 

Hyde nodded

"Ok, ok. Left, r.you're leading! Ok, now. Tell me where to move with your hand. Uh-huh. Left, right, left, turn, uh-huh, ok, eye contact in the turn, ok, ok, and.dip!" Kitty leans back only to tumble to the ground. "Ok, well now let's just do it again." 

The doors swung open admitting both Eric and Fez into the living room. "What the hell? Mom, are you teaching him how to dance?" Both Hyde and Kitty slowly turned to face Eric. "Oh my god, you really do like Jackie, your learning to dance so you can get her back!"

"No!" Hyde declared solemnly. "I just can't let those future tools of the government win!" 

Kitty smiled politely "We'll I'm going to go get dinner started. We'll continue the lessons later." Trotting off to the kitchen she sang out happily, "Ohhh Jackie's going to be so surprised."

Eric turned to Fez, "It looks to me like someone went to Oz and got himself a heart." Eric grinned shaking his head.

  
"Shut up Foreman, I told you, I'm just saving her from those brainless blondes."

Fez furrowed his brow, "So you just plan on showing up and dancing?" The foreign exchange student questioned, Hyde shrugged. "You amateur! In order to win back your lady love you must show some spirit, sweep her off her feet." 

"And how exactly is he supposed to do that Fez?"

"Show up and punch whatever basterd she is dancing with!" 

Hyde smirked happily, "You now what little buddy, I think I just might take that into consideration."

**********  
  
The Situation. Point Place High:

Cynthia and Rodger glided across the floor, easily coming to a halt in front of the little Jackie Burkhart gang. "She and Daniel look so cute together!" Cynthia squealed happily as she watched the brunette twirl in her beautiful red dress. "I'm sure this is totally going to be the next big power couple. I mean Daniel is the Junior Class President, and a running back on the football team."

Pam however paid little attention to brunette or Cynthia's ranting. Her eyes were focused slowly on Kelso as he danced with Kevin's little ex Anna. The steam nearly billowed out of her ears. Kevin didn't seem to fare any better. "Sorry Kevin but I think were over!" The blond muttered before charging across the room to lunge for Anna's throat.

Jackie was bored out of her wits, dancing with this moron was taking every last inch of her patience, and consequently fueling her anger for Hyde by the second. She had started a running list in her head, calling him every dirty name she could think of and planning years of torture, which of course would never be executed but seemed somewhat comforting. But then again this was Hyde she was thinking of, mister show no emotions. He was probably having a ball with some new wild and anarchist girlfriend. The thought alone nearly made the little girl see red. But what had she gotten herself into. In the beginning she had known this wouldn't last, no matter how much she'd wanted it too. Hyde wasn't the kind of guy who settled down with one girl. No matter how much she wanted him too. She was so preoccupied with her own thoughts Jackie never noticed when she and Daniel stopped moving, or when her date turned away from her to address someone. "Can I help you?"

"You're dancing with my girlfriend!" Now that voice she did recognize, though she hardly believed her ears.

Daniel laughed, "In your dreams!"

Jackie rolled her eyes calling out to Hyde, "Oh just go ahead and punch the guy so I can kick your ass!"

"Lady's orders!" Hyde shrugged, socking the guy in the face. Hyde quietly stepped over the prone form to face of with the smaller brunette. 

"You think you're off the hook?" Jackie demanded, "Just because you showed up at a stupid dance a couple hours too late." Hyde smirked glad to see that his little pixie was responding just like she ought to. At least the stupid cheerleaders hadn't totally warped her back into some freak. He took a step forward, slipping his hand around her waist and pulling her closely. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Dancing with my girlfriend." 

"Hello! I broke up with you." Jackie declared, trying to pull free of his grip, but Hyde wasn't about to let go.

"We weren't going out before, at least not by you cheerleading friend's standards." That had taken a lot of self control not to call them bloodsucking blonds. "So now, Jaclyn Burkhart, do you wanna go to the hub and get a burger or something?"

The shock raced across her face faster then he'd expected, then came the squealing as she threw her arms around his neck jumping into his arms and peppering his face with kisses. "You asked me on a date!" She squealed happily, only to be interrupted when Pam's call for help shattered the air. 

"Quick someone call an ambulance, Kelso's fainted."

Next Chapter coming at lot sooner then this one.. I promise.


End file.
